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Thread: Feeling used......by my own baby

  1. #1

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    Default Feeling used......by my own baby

    Ive had a feeling she was relying on sucking to go to sleep - last night confirmed it. Every 2 hours she was up, id give her some boob, and off to sleep she would go. I was so fed up by 5am i put her in bed with me and DH. She wont take the dummy (although i will try more today). I have feelings of being used by my own baby - is this wrong?. She's gone from sleeping 6-8 hours to now discovering her hands, thus discovering sucking. I cannot keep feeding her every 2 hours (the feeds last 3 mins sometimes!!!!) during the night.
    During the day she has good feeds. SHes putting on weight. Anyone have any advice.....man i need it....


  2. #2

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    It could also be a growth spurt & so she is needing more feeds & will settle againj in a few days...
    Maybe try to get her to feed a bit longer & hopefully then she'll sleep a bit longer before next feed...
    Also I didnt know it but Indah used to feed every 3-5 hours during the day but from 5pm, she'd feed every 1.5-2 hours til about 10pm, then she'd sleep alnight, apparently she was stocking up so she could sleep alnight!????

    Good Luck, have faith that although its' tiring now, next week things will have changed again!!!

  3. #3

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    Don't worry about feeling used, I have those feelings at times. Could be a wonder week, I don't have the book, but someone may be able to look it up for you. Also it has been getting colder at night, is she warm enough?

  4. #4

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    If you don;t have any hang ups about it, why don't you try a dummy?
    I have a sucky baby too, and a dummy can work wonders. She won't have it all the time, but long enough for her to stretch out her feeds and soothe her to sleep longer.

  5. #5

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    The only thing I would say with a dummy though is if she is having a growth spurt and needs milk, she is going to get less milk. Do you co-sleep? Perhaps it might help you get more sleep that way? She's still very little, both of my two went in and out of phases with it and I believe it was with growth spurts. How is she feeding and sleeping during the day?
    Kelly xx

    Creator of BellyBelly.com.au, doula, writer and mother of three amazing children
    Author of Want To Be A Doula? Everything You Need To Know
    Follow me in 2015 as I go Around The World + Kids!
    Forever grateful to my incredible Mod Team and many wonderful members who have been so supportive since 2003.

  6. #6

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    I still have a sucky baby!

    Jo

  7. #7

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    When you work it out could you please let me know. Tehya is still doing it at nearly 15 months. She starts of the night in her bed then wake after 4 hours for a comfort feed and iis up every couple of hours after that for a comfort suck. I try to give her her dummy but she pushes it away and demands bb. I am up atleast 3 - 4 times a night still.

    Sorry I couldn'e be any help, just to let you know that I totally know where you are coming from

  8. #8

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    I better add, me too, with an 18 month old! It's been the cause of many a burn out here - if you don't have much support it makes it so hard. I had one big one last night - the whole energy required for the expo and breastfeeding was too much - you need something like 2000kj to make breastmilk! No wonder we get so tired.

    Elijah wakes at 12, comes into our bed then every few hours will latch on. This is normal behaviour, Marisa did this too, but it doesn't come across as normal due to the way things have changed and certain routines have been introduced. Some babies are just like this and you can either try and make it as easy as possible through co-sleeping or try some other methods of coersion - expressing for hubby to bottlefeed. I know it is hard, trust me, both f my children have been like this and it's exhausting over four years. Hard work at times and nothing else has worked for me - I was kicked out after two weeks at a sleep school with Marisa when she was 4-5 months old, both of us in worse shape than when we went in.

    So get support behind you, call the ABA, have a think about what you want to do, weigh up pro's and con's and know lots of other women are going through this and your baby is normal. Unfortunately we no longer live in such a communial / community living that we can't draw on as much support - you have to go seek it to survive. Make sure you take out time for you, get some rest and go for a massage or something else regularly. Get out for an hour or even half an hour each day without baby if it's possible. Who cares if it's to the supermarket to get milk - it all helps the sanity. Sleep when baby is sleeping, sleep on weekends, get a post-natal doula for the hard times - anything helps. The worst thing you can do is not seek help.
    Kelly xx

    Creator of BellyBelly.com.au, doula, writer and mother of three amazing children
    Author of Want To Be A Doula? Everything You Need To Know
    Follow me in 2015 as I go Around The World + Kids!
    Forever grateful to my incredible Mod Team and many wonderful members who have been so supportive since 2003.

  9. #9

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    Sophie is great in the day - feeds every 2 hours, sometimes less. Has a play with her sister, then falls alseep. SOmetimes on the breast, othertimes on her own. She doesnt have a lot of hours sleep in day - prob 3 hours all up. The thing is I LOVE BREASTFEEDING, did with DD#1 too, but when its almost every hour your up, by the 4th or 5th time you start resenting it a bit. I think i yelled, 'right, we're goign onto formula' sometime during last nights escapade - i resent saying it now, i dont want to feel like that, but i guess thats what broken sleep does.

    Ive tried the dummy today and she suckign it like a trooper. For the past week at lunchtime ive been giving her 20mls of EBM - every day she's been smiling or just playing with the teat - but today she gulped the 20mls. Its been a long day, but im so happy she took it.

    I LOVE co sleeping, but DH wont have it (grrrrr). We'll see how tonight goes......maybe it is a growth spurt like some of you have said......

  10. #10

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    Maddy is exactly like Trish's Tehya....she sleeps an initial 4-6hrs then wants a feed/comfort suck that only last about 10mins before she drifts off to sleep. Then she basically wakes every 1.5-2hrs for comfort sucks. After her big patch of sleep which is generally in her cot; she spends the rest of the night with us in bed. I don't think I could cope getting up out of bed every 90mins to feed her for 5mins and then put her back to sleep. Plus, she seems to love snuggling in next to Mummy's boobies for a sleep.

    Glad to hear that Sophie took the dummy today for you, perhaps that'll help at night if you can just pop it in when she wakes up for a comfort suck? It might not work all night but even if it puts a longer time between comfort feeds during the night that'll be a help won't it?

  11. #11

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    [QUOTE=Beckibee]Maddy is exactly like Trish's Tehya....she sleeps an initial 4-6hrs then wants a feed/comfort suck that only last about 10mins before she drifts off to sleep. Then she basically wakes every 1.5-2hrs for comfort sucks. After her big patch of sleep which is generally in her cot; she spends the rest of the night with us in bed. I don't think I could cope getting up out of bed every 90mins to feed her for 5mins and then put her back to sleep. Plus, she seems to love snuggling in next to Mummy's boobies for a sleep.
    QUOTE]

    That is Maggie to a "T" most nights. Co sleeping is what saved me when she stopped sleeping through. DH is fine with it luckily. Actually as the weather is getting colder I do prefer it, that way I don't have to worry about her getting cold.

  12. #12

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    Mine is 13 months and still feeds 2 hourly day and night because shes quite simply hungry. She started to sleep through when she was little but once she hit a big growth spurt at 2.5 months it ended. Since then shes either been in a growthspurt, milestone or teething. Its just the way she is, she always reached her milestones early and is very healthy and happy so I don't care. Shes on the chubby side but whenever we are at a playground or meet other babies her age shes also ALOT taller and even taller then 2 year olds *shrug*

    Initially I had her cot beside my bed and tried putting her back in there asleep each time to avoid co-sleeping but it was just too hard so I gave in to it and it made it so much easier. Unless I have a really late night or shes waking up real bad because shes sick or teething her molars I cope really well now as I am used to it. Last night from what I can remember it seems she slept right through to 4:30am and I was wide eyed awake and out of bed at 5am because of it lol

    I enjoy it now, I have an expensive boori cot and quilt/sheet sets etc... thats only been used for just hours but whatever aslong as shes happy so am I! Maybe if I have another, he or she will get use out of it hehe

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