Luey, our boys sound so similar - maybe we should start a club
When I first started trying to sleep with him, it didn't work too well - it was still hard to get him to sleep and he would wake constantly. But now that he's used to it, I feel so much better. We both sleep better. I have no real idea how many times he wakes up in the night cause I never really wake up fully. He now goes to sleep very easily beside me - often I don't have to do anything at all, just being there is enough. I still try him in teh cot to begin with - sometimes he's happy in there and will sleep well - but if he's waking constantly I take it as his way of saying "Mummy, I can't sleep on my own tonight" and we sleep together.
If you're comfortable with the idea, I really suggest you give it a go. Just be prepared to stick with it for a while cause it can be a bit of an adjustment for you both (as is anything). Otherwise, use the swing or whatever works! At this point you've both just got to get some sleep however you can.
Oh, and BTW, I've left DS in his cot to roll & grizzle & yell & "talk" before. Largely in the blind hope that he'll drop off to sleep. Doesn't work though (does it?), and he's always so glad to see me when I come back, though he never gets distressed about it.
OH, and have you read nighttime parenting? I've been skimming it last couple of days - it's making me feel better about the situation and my current 'solution'.