Juliette,

Firstly *huge hugs* sweety, I know the lack of sleep is a killer and you are doing the best you can - so well done for doing what you do best. You sound like a wonderful mother and she is very lucky to have you there for her.

I've noticed such a pattern of mums posting with / talking about sleep issues with four month old babies - it is a difficult time and I could have written everything you have said for my first - I tried the whole sleep school thing too, as much as it was against what I believed in - and you can imagine my frustration and dismay when the very thing I didn't want to do but everyone else swore by didn't work either! They gave up on me after two weeks! LOL! Marisa ended up sleeping through after two years, and not long after Elijah was born, so I truly do know how much of a killer sleep can be.

I too hate it that people have plenty of useless comments for those wanting to be a gentle parent - always keep in mind that there is a nice little cheersquad on BellyBelly (picture us cheering you on in the background or on your shoulder LOL!) who will back you up 100%, we all believe in what you do and will remind you that you are doing such an amazing thing for your daughter. We'll also remind you where those annoying, interfering people can stick that rod! Remember there are plenty of statistics and experts to back up the benefits of what you are doing.

The big thing for me is, no matter what parenting method you choose, the general difference I see between those who cope and those who don't is support. Does your partner help you during the nights? Do you have much family support? Can someone play with her during the day so you can get a sleep? If not, have you thought about a post-natal doula or casual babysitter/nanny to watch her while you rest - even if just once a week? ALLOW YOURSELF TO BE SUPPORTABLE!!! Accept all the help you need right now to get over this hurdle.

You've read the best there is out there from the sounds of it and you can read as much info as you like and take what works for you - often a mish mash of everything we read. But at the end of the day, not all babies are great sleepers no matter what you try, so the main thing you have to remember is 'this too will pass' and get by as best you can by rounding up what support you have.

If you don't have many friends around, joining a playgroup might be a great idea - it will introduce you and bubs to some new friends, will tire her out and make you feel alive. I always notice a huge difference in my kids moods and energy once we've been out for the day - my kids sleep so much better!

What is your nightly routine like? Have you tried infant massage? Could your partner take her for a walk at night while you prepare dinner?

So many questions but hopefully will give you some ideas and also help to work with it a bit more.

As I have recommended to some other girls, "The Wonder Weeks" is a great book - she may be going through a developmental phase and babies are often more wakeful, cry more etc when they are having a developmental change or growth spurt or even early stages of teething - it's a time when it's very common to be facing any of these issues. Elijah started at four months and has been continually teething, so I have been going through many crisises of confidence of late but reminding myself all of this, I am coping much better with it. Tired as hell, but in my mind, I am content. I know I will miss this one day. Sick mummy... LOL!

A thing I try to remember when I am feeling like I am going to lose the plot during bad days / nights is that baby is just trying to tell you things don't feel right just now and she's not trying to pi$$ you off or test your limits. Keep trying different things, keep doing what you are doing and you will get past this, I promise Motherhood is a bloody hard job, if you give into it and let yourself do what you feel you need to do, it makes it sooooo much easier.

Good luck chicky