OK, so DS now no longer wakes up in hunger every hour.
He just wakes up every couple of hours and won't feed back to sleep. He won't go back to sleep. He wants to sleep, but won't. I end up walking up and down and up and down the hall with him until he's asleep, then we may get another hour until he's awake again. Refusing to feed, refusing to stay asleep.
I have some options.
First, the Dr Seuss CD keeps him asleep in the car. Do I just have my nights with The Cat in the Hat and others playing all night to make DS sleep? Sadly, he clocks on to sleep props and they stop working very soon, so that would stop car sleeps. And I don't want a CD on loop all night for the next few years.
Second, he will go back to sleep in his chair if I rock it (he won't sleep in his bed if I rock it). Should I just let him sleep in his chair?
Third, do I just hope he'll get over it and accept the fact that I will never sleep again?
Fourth, could he be too cold? Whilst I am happy sleeping in just underwear and a blanket right now, maybe DS is too cold in a bodysuit and a sleeping bag? Should I put him back in a sleepsuit? But that would roast him. Then again, I get cold at 5am, but that's because I'm not under my blanket! I do put a small sheet over him so his little arms don't get cold, but that doesn't seem to work.
If he likes sleeping in the chair, let him. When Lelani came home, she slept in her carseat through the whole day. I only laid her down at night. She still sleeps in the seat sometimes. I don't think it matter where he sleeps, maybe he gets a little reflux and sitting up helps. As for Dr Seuss. I think maybe try for a night. If it works, great, you got one night's sleep, if not, try something els.
Stay strong, one day he will be 18, THEN you can sleep late and stay in bed the whole time!!!!!
I got this off the internet for you. I have a book that says the amout of blankets that should be ok for the temp of the night, but I lend it to a friend and I can't call her now (her bub has just come home, I don't bother new moms) This was the nearest I could find. Hope it helps.
Managing your baby's temperature
Babies are unable to regulate their body temperature in the way adults do. When adults are cold they shiver, and when hot, they sweat. It is important to keep your baby neither to hot nor to cold. The following suggestions are given to help you keep your baby's temperature within the normal range (36.6oC to 37.2oC):
Try to keep the room temperature between 16-20oC - this temperature is comfortable for most adults wearing short sleeves.
Use the right amount of clothing and bedding - during the day your baby should wear the same amount of clothes as you wear plus an extra layer. For example if you are wearing a shirt, baby should wear a babygro or t-shirt or dress plus a cardigan. Babies should wear hats in summer to stop them becoming sunburnt and in winter to stop then getting cold. At night babies should wear a nappy, vest and babygro or gown plus a sheet and couple of blankets. If the room is cooler than 16oC then 3-4 blankets will be necessary; if the room is warmer than 20oC then only 1 blanket or perhaps only a sheet will be needed.
If your baby seems restless or fussy and his skin is flushed and feels hot, remove a piece of clothing or blanket. It is normal for babies to have cool hands and feet but if they feel cold and look blue and blotchy, add mittens, socks/bootees, a hat and a cardigan or blanket. Remember to take off baby's outdoor clothes when you get inside.
A hot water bottle can be used to warm a bed but babies should not be placed next to the bottle. The cot, pram (buggy) or car seat should not be next to a radiator, heater or fire, in direct sunshine or near to draughts - for example an open window.. Remember, babies who are swaddled in a heated car can easily become overheated. Never leave your baby in the car without you being there.
Before bathing your baby, make sure the room is warm and that doors and windows are shut.
Hi Ryn,
Sorry, I may have missed this, but have you ruled out co-sleeping? Just that this will regulate body temperature and eliminate being cold as a problem.
Also, it is not recommended to leave babies in their capsules or carseats when they're not actually going anywhere in the car. I know that I will leave DS sleeping from time to time if we get home and he's fallen asleep, but he's a bit older now and his chest cavity is more mature. The reasoning is that the angle that the seat puts the baby's middle in compromises their breathing. It was a recent study that suggested this. I know, they can be at their most peaceful when sleeping in the carseat! However, DS has never stayed asleep when trying to move him in the carseat, but he HAS stayed asleep after getting him out of it and into the house and into bed.
None of this probably helps - sorry!
DS can sweat, I have seen him do it (when feeding him near the window)! And I though current guidelines were after the first month to dress baby as yourself? I may be mistaken though. His core body temperature is fine when he wakes; I do check that.
DS does have a little reflux, or rather did, he is over that now. And he has done 7 hours in bed before, just not for over a month now.
I just don't really want to create props I don't want - I'm OK for a soft toy or blanket, but a CD on all night is not desirable. DS sleeps in his chair in the day (and part of last night) but he needs to sleep in a bed some time, I don't want this to be a trauma. Which is why I'm agonising about it, I suppose.
Mayaness, once DS is awake and I'm in bed we do co-sleep. He still won't sleep. His chair isn't a carseat - although I do let him stay asleep if he falls asleep in the carseat or pushchair as his day sleeps are so short, he's always awake within half an hour of coming home.
I have seen Lelani sweat also. It's actually cute! I am the last to question current guidelines. Mine was prem and she was permenatly "over-dressed" I was so afraid that she would lose weight, because her unhandy mother did not keep her warm enough. But she is her daddy's daugher and heats up very quickly. But beside the point.
I don't know his history and are not his mother, but maybe it is time to step back. Maybe you need to re-think your situation and his routine and his feeds and EVERYTHING. Maybe there is something that bothers him that you are missing, because you are focused on him not sleeping. Could be anything under the sun. How is he sleeping during the day? He's not on owl-mode? (Sleeping in the day and playing at night) Getting that right is a whole other storie (or so I hear - luck not to have happend to me) Yeez, it sounds like I am a know-it-all. I am a first mom also and are the last person to ask, but it's just my opinion.
When referring to his chair, is it a bouncer or something similar? If it's something like that, then I say let him sleep there. Nina went through a stage of only sleeping in her bouncer. I would strap her in, bring her into our room so she was right next to me, and we'd all get decent amount of sleep for the night.
How much sleep is he having during the day? Is there anything that has thrown his night time routine out lately? And the famous one, is he teething?
It is possible he's not comfortable in the clothing (ie too cold or hot). We dress Nina in a singlet, wondersuit & sleeping bag, whereas we're only sleeping in t-shirt & undies. If I dress her in any less, then she feels cold and has a terrible night sleep.
Is there any other comforters he likes apart from the music? Or how about only having the music on for the first hour, just to get him past the first sleep cycle?
Nadine, I really do welcome all suggestions, but I have been trying EVERYTHING. He is in a fairly decent daily routine. He has 2-3 naps during the day, albeit short naps. I have tried understimulating, overstimulating, attending him only when he cries, filling our day with outdoors activities, having toy-free days (luckily I know loads of stories!), not letting him have any sleep during the day, not letting him feed save for 4 hour intervals, not letting him feed all morning so he gets used to hunger, feeding every 1-2 hours... and some normal days too (we tend to do a week or normal days then a couple of days of something new). I also let him fuss in his crib, he has to be crying before I'll go grab him because he does sometimes go back to sleep. I'm just at the end of my tether!
I am the last person to ask but at the moment I am also stuck for an answer - now DD is waking from midnight to 3 am and will not go back to sleep - doesn't want feeding, nappy change, etc, etc....and when I get her back to sleep will only sleep for an hour or two at most.....so.....like Nadine says - look at a few different things - day routine - does he need to decrease his sleeps from maybe 2 to 1 during the day, how is solid intake going during the day - someone suggested to me - porridge after DD's veges and meat for her dinner....just to give her some carbs to maybe fill her up a bit more....ummm...let me have a think and if I come up with anything that works for DD I will let you know too. If someone said to me when I was pregnant I would still have a baby who didn't sleep through the night at 11 months I would never have believed them...thank goodness for coffee
Laurin
His morning sleeps are variable, but he usually gets 3 hours or so sleep during the day, usually short sleep in the morning, longish at noon and short nap in the afternoon. However, if we have Dr Seuss on he'll sleep for hours and hours in the car. Music, like special baby classical or lullabies, won't cut it, it has to be the Dr Seuss.
He has a soft bunny to take to bed, he also has a rattley elephant in his bed and he does love them both. He will sleep past the first sleep cycle anyway, but wakes up usually just before I want to go to bed, irrespective of if I want an early or late night! He has just cut a tooth, but tbh he's been teething since 8w so I'm soooo over blaming teething for poor sleep.
All the mother and baby (or just coffee) groups have shut down for summer, it could be that, but I do make sure I take him out at those times anyway.
Laurin, we are even trying hungry baby formula at night to sort his tum! I make sure he has carbs for dinner too (baby rice or potato with his fruit and veg).
mmm - so it doesn't sound like it is a hunger thing - and probably he is so overtired that he can't go back to sleep....I think we both need a magic wand!
Sorry bout that, Ryn, the carseat thing was more for the poster who mentioned it. But, as I said, I did it sometimes, myself, cos I knew it didn't happen often and I would check on him all the time. I'd let him sleep in the bouncer if he's happy there - at least they cradle the bum softer than a 'seat', where there is more compaction of the vulnerable spine.
I may have also missed this, but do you have a soft cloth sling? I used to (ha! still do!) get DS to sleep in the sling, and when he was 'convincingly asleep', I'd transfer him to the bed next to me.
Getting DS to sleep requires sling time and a couple of boobie feeds (usually in the sling), but once he's asleep from that, he's out (unless he's sick).
Like someone else said - maybe this requires going back to basics. We did that a few times, each time that DS's patterns changed.
The sling has been our saving grace, though. We used a HAB and now an Ergo, but sometimes a shoulder slilng.
ETA: The sling also keeps baby so close to you that warmth will not be an issue
Mitchell was the worst sleeper and the most unsettled baby in the world. Always had to be held, only slept an hour and a half MAX for months - failed sleep school miserably. He was an extreme case - but I learnt some things along the way.
The first of which is to take care of you. Everything seems soooooooo much worse when you are sleep deprived. DH will have to take him off your hands for a few hours at least on the weekend. I know he can be precious about his bloody 'me' time, but he has to take care of you so you can remain partially sane.
Don't count the hours you haven't slept, count the ones you have!
Mitchell clicked onto any sleep routine vey quickly (and firmly put us back in our place), so I stopped bothering after awhile. The endless apparent teething/silent reflux/colic diagnoses were doing my head in,as was the endless stupid advice.
The best thing for my morale was my mum ringing up with stories about my cousin. My aunt can't believe he made it to 21, he never slept. Literally. At the very least I could imagine her trying to sleep on the couch with one foot rocking his pram, and not feel so bad.
Some babies just don't respond like others do, but it really, really can't last forever. Take care of you first though, make sure you eat properly as well. Have a nice long bath, DH can run it for you and stick all your fav smellies in there, you only need an hour or so to recharge.
I have a sling, but you cannot transfer DS out of it without it waking him any more. We did use to sling him to sleep, now we feed or walk him to sleep - and still sling him to sleep if it's not the nighttime.
Actually, next week DH isn't working, so he's going to do the nighttime, then I'm getting up with DS and taking him out all morning so DH gets some sleep then. Afternoon is family time, late evening couple time, then back to taking it in turns to sleep.
I tend to count sleep as any hours I'm not out of bed - so last night I got to sleep half an hour before walking DS to sleep, then 5 hours (as I got him back to sleep once without getting out of bed), then a one hour break where I was awake and slept almost 2 hours (on the sofa) before I got up again. While I am rested, I'm just not liking having to get out of my bed! And I was mad last night as DH was on the computer almost all night even though I ask him to come off once DS is in bed so we can do something together and I had to nag for that last night.
Actually, DH is better now - he doesn't nag me to do more housework and he did wash up his fishing/camping food stuff all by himself without me telling him there was no way I was washing that as it was a week old and mouldy. He's just not too keen on 1-1 with DS without me there to take DS should he wimper. (He gives me DS, I don't even stir from my coffee/book until DH tells me he can't "cope" with a bit of an upset.)
Lulu, what made things suddenly click for Mitchell?
hi Ryn, im so sorry that you are having sleep troubles, just want to let you know that DS had two periods of needing music all night and during the day to sleep, but they were only stages he grew out of them, so don't be afraid that you will have to have music all night forever. Goodluck!
I've nothing new to suggest. Possibly your DS is the model that sleeps through from 6 months (or 7, or 9). You've tried so much, this is NOT you or your parenting! He's just a wakeful little chap - he's smart like mumma and he doesn't want to miss anything.
Me again
Reply With Quote
Ryn, you're having such a touch time with sleeps.
Bookmarks