DD also usually wakes between 5 and 6 (after 10-11 hours of sleep, with one feed at around 1am). I then take her into my bed where she gets a BF and then sleeps for another hour or two. So you could try that.

And I also have to say that if she doesn't wanna go to sleep, I don't persist anymore. Not now that she's older. If she seems to resist sleep, I try and distract her, go for a walk around the block, then try again. Otherwise I just get too frustrated.

I second the recommendations for those 2 books. I love Pinky McKay's advice, very gentle, but tangible suggestions.

And I also second the sling idea. Your DS might be a little old to introduce them, though. So just try it out and see how you go. I'm not sure how strong you are. I could imagine if you haven't been doing babywearing regularly, starting with a heavy 9 months old might be tough. So make sure you get a really comfy one like a HAB or an Ergo. Especially the Ergo seems to be great with older bubs.

Does he sleep in his car seat?

Don't listen to the CC brigade. You have stuck it out for this long. An end is in sight. It might just need some gentle tweaking to your routines to make a difference.

And for what it's worth, I don't personally know ANY baby that you can just put into their cots and they roll over and sleep. Upon further questioning, even the mums who insist on having ideal sleepers, admit to either a few night settling moments, or to continued crying or to the baby using props that they have been taught to use as mummy substitutes (like being extremely attached to a certain Teddy, or not being able to go anywhere without a dummy).

I hope sleep will improve in your household soon.
Sasa