What do you do with unwanted sleep advice?!

[[M]umma[M]ia]

Take it all in. Educate yourself on other peoples ideas. Not just for yourself, but down the track, a friend might be having a few issues and from everything u have read and people have told u, u can get them to check out the websites etc. I NEVER dismiss advice. People are just trying to help.

[{sarah}]

I'm sorry Mumma Mia, but I have to disagree with you. I will not listen to people telling me to make my child cry & scream whilst I ignore him & I won't listen to the advice that tells me to go to so-called experts who suggest the same sorts of things. I would never ever suggest that sort of thing to others either, so no point in taking it in. My child is going to a neurologist in two weeks, suggesting that I make his room darker or give him warm mik before bed or sending him to bed early etc etc isn't going to help me or him.

I realise people are trying to help & I appreciate the thought behind it but after 4 years of the same suggestions over & over it gets a bit much. And yes the same people give the same advice regularly.

[Trillian]

Take it all in. Educate yourself on other peoples ideas. Not just for yourself, but down the track, a friend might be having a few issues and from everything u have read and people have told u, u can get them to check out the websites etc. I NEVER dismiss advice. People are just trying to help.

Can I ask if you could honestly save up info and pass it onto someone else in good conscience if it is advice that you wouldn't take yourself? Or if it was just the dumbest piece of advice you'd ever heard or something that went completely against your parenting choices? I know I couldn't and I've been doing this parenting caper for quite a few years now. It would just go against every fibre of my being to pass on crap information - I couldnt' have someone tell me to use CC, disregard it because it's not what I do, and yet pass it onto someone else as something they should do.

Sarah, I just don't mention it - people probably think that Alister was a perfect sleeper because I rarely complained to anyone IRL or mentioned that he was having so much trouble when he was a baby with his sleep (not so much now thankfully!) but in reality he was a shocker! I guess i didn't say anything because it kinda avoided anyone giving me advice but also because I just didn't think they needed to know kwim? I think if you are polite when you do get unwanted or dodgy advice that you can't go wrong - they feel better for imparting their little gem of wisdom and you don't seem like you're ungrateful if you said thanks but no thanks Or if it is the same people giving you the same old advice you could always say "yeah, tried that one the last time you suggested it, have you got any other ideas?" but that would only come across right if you knew them well enough LOL

[Nelle]

Keep some really yummy lollies in your bag, and eat one for every sentence of advice you get.

[Janie]

Nelle, that is the best!!!!!!!

I think that is a great suggestion Trill - if it's the same old people, tell them it didn't work last time, and ask if they have anything new! Classic!

Sorry Sarah, to laugh in your serious thread, not making light of your situation

[onthefly]

I'm just honest.
Yep, tried that.
Uh-huh, that's interesting.
Nup, won't do that.

We're only 18 months in though, it must get very tiresome after a few years... congrats on 4 nights with no wakeups.

[{sarah}]

Haha Janie, it's all good

And Trillian, love it!

[Roryrory]

Hey Sarah for what its worth the guy who used to run my local fruit shop had a son who wouldn't sleep (I'm talking getting to the age of 2 and never sleeping more than 45mins ata stretch) and in the end they took him to a neurologist and I think it was some hormonal inbalance with him. But just when they were about to "diagnose" him it all went away the bugger grew out of it! Before that though his parents went thru hell trying to convince everyone they weren't doing the "wrong" thing and it was something physical going on. I know this won't help much but you are not alone in having these sorts of issues.

[christy]

Sarah we still have 3-4 wake ups a week with Matilda taking an hour or so to get back to sleep... Its frustrating and everyone tells you what you should do and how you should do it. You are doing a great job staying sane!!! Thats the best thing you can do. If someone gives me advice... and it happens often , I say "Well thats great that you think that would work...." and try to vaguely walk away....

I hope your neurologist helps!