futuremum - big hugs - don't give up.
My mum tried to fall pregnant for 16 years before I was born and then when she was 46 - yes you read right 46 she fell pregnant with my brother 10 years after I was born and both she and my dad were told they would never be parents.
Miracles happen (although I'm not sure she remembers that with a 16 yo ...lol)
Don't give up honey - I loved having older parents - they had to much more time for us
A friend of my mum's had a baby at 46 and I know of someone in the last few months who had her first baby, and she turned 45 during her last trimester.
I gave birth for the first time one month after my 42nd birthday. This was 14 years after I'd first decided I wanted to have a child.
The baby was conceived naturally without any medical intervention at any stage. I was drinking loads of coffee when I conceived and was highly stressed, taking no vitamins but all turned out well. I had been told that my only hope of a successful pregnancy at my age was to go on IVF. They were wrong.
The pregnancy was a really easy one - no morning sickness at all - I glowed throughout the pregnancy and looked better than I had in years. The birth was a bit on the hard side but I don't think that had anything to do with my age.
If you do succeed don't listen to any OB's who scare you with all the risks of giving birth over 40. I was told I'd probably have to stop work at 20 weeks and most likely be flat on my back for the rest of the pregnancy. I was told I'd be at high risk of giving birth prematurely. I was also told I'd have BP problems due to my age. All this from a female OB, you'd think she'd know better. Obviously I had to get a new OB and the new one thought my risks were no greater than anyone else as I had no health issues. I worked full time up to 37 weeks at a desk job and didn't ever get high BP. I gave birth vaginally 1 week and 4 days before my due date. I was fully recovered physically 3 weeks after the birth.
We did have a DS scare when the risk came in at 1/37 but the amnio showed no abnormalities and bubs was born "normal". You can expect to end up having more scans than normal, I had 8 in total, but many younger women have to have extra scans too.
A friend of mine told me over the weekend that she's pregnant. She's nearly 41. They started TTC late last year I think, she had a m/c at about 5w early this year, and now she's nearly 7w. It all happened without any fertility assistance.
I was exactly 39&half when I fell pregnant with my daughter (my 1st born) ... she was concieved naturally with the help of a herbal formula !!
She was born naturally & drug-free 4mths past my 40th birthday ... I will be 43 next Jan & we have so far been trying for another bub for 1year again with the help with the same herbal formula which I've been taking (I think) since Feb this year !!
With my daughter I was told I would not concieve without the help of IVF & yet I had her naturally.
This January I was told by a IVF specialist that I have a slim chance of even falling pregnant on IVF ... their reason purely because of my age & no other reason.
I guess because we also hear of stories of women having babies at 50 we keep trying. I too wonder at what age do I decide that I have tried & it's time to try no more
I honestly don't know whether I could go past 45 or 46 ... purely because I know I myself am not the fittest person & with my daughter I never realised how much physical energy they took to look after.
I wish you heartfelt wishes in whatever you chose to do from here on
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