I am in a place right now where I seriously think that I am going to die a bitter old childless hag.

This whole concepetion thing is getting to me. I have had enough, I have charted, opked analysed, lost weight (30kg) and I have had it. Nothing is working.

The thing that scares me the most is I am becoming a bitter, cranky horrible person. It has gotten to the point where I can not look at a pregnant woman. I am not happy for friends when they announce their pregnancies. I am getting majorly depressed when THAT time comes.

My brother just had a georgious baby boy on Tuesday and my DH and I are traveling to see them on the weekend which cruely enough is when my AF is due. He has two beautiful children (and I love them I am not that bitter YET) but I just do not feel that I can deal with this right now without resenting the fact that I am not pregant.

Both of my brothers pregnancies where "pill" babies and I resent that too.

I think that my husband and I are both good people, we have been resposible and even saved for this and nothing - I just wonder if it will ever be my turn...