Hi peekay,
I was just diagnosed with PCO (not PCOS) last week. In the last 7 months I've had 3 cycles. I totally understand your frustration. I had my FS appointment last Monday. She was sure that I hadn't O'd but I was sure I had - and the BT proved it. Like you my whole last cycle DH and I BD'd every 2 days (very tiring as it was a 75 day cycle!). I did temping, checked cm and used OPKs. I'm lucky I guess in that the OPKs really work for me and it then gives me a 12-36hour window of when I will O. Some women with PCOS however are unable to use OPKs as their LH levels are always high and so the surge before O won't be detected. So OPKs are something for you could try. As far as the temps go unless you've been charting for the whole cycle its very hard to know if your temps are up or if that's how you always are.... Once you then know when you O then you'll have a good idea of when AF will arrive. Average luteal phase length (length of time between O and AF) is from 11-17 days. CM observations also can be fairly reliable. If you see the ewcm then you could expect AF about 14 days after that.
Good luck in the rest of the wait for your FS appointment. Its a long wait but you'll get there. There's heaps they can do to help you so just hang in there. Just keep observing what you can and enjoy BD!