DS and DD are 23 months apart. Ive never had to have the thought of oh why did i have them so close. They get along so well. Theres 4 years between my brother and i and my brother and my sister and i found that too big of a gap. We were never really close at all.
This baby was going to be about the same as DS & DD but had complications on the way.. but will be 2 yrs 7 months younger than DD. Im happy with that difference. Not too close but not too far apart.
Go with your instincts. You won't be disappointed that way.
My instincts told me 3-4 years between kids. I talked myself into a 2.5yr age gap because of our life circumstances. It has been a struggle. I wish I had've listened to my gut.
However, you will get by regardless of the age gap. You deal with what you've got and you make the most of it. IMO it just depends on your outlook, as with most life events. There's no ideal time to have a kid, get married, study etc necessarily, only what works for you or what you make work for you.
All the best!
The million dollar question!!!
My two are 3yrs1mth apart, not exactly by choice as it took time to concieve DD, but i enjoy this gap so much that i'm trying for #3 at the same gap. I have friends who have 18mth gaps, some with 11mths and 13mths, and one with 11yrs b4 her twins were born. And we all can describe the good and bad points of each of these!!
My DS is starting fulltime school next year, which means that my DD will get me all to her self for a while, then hopefully #3 will arrive.
I think that you will know when you are ready for another baby and that's the gap that will be best for you!
HTH
As lots of people have said it is a very individual thing. Noone can tell you what will suit you or your family but you and your partner.
I have 16mths between my first two, and while it is great now, when they were smaller it was pretty difficult for me to cope. They both didn't sleep well, DS was a surprise little gift and whist we were planning on always having 2-3 kids, he came a fair bit earlier than we had expected. DS was full breastfed and was a booby monster and DD wanted me to be with her all the time too, only being a baby herself. I had wanted to wait til DD was nearing 2, so having a 2 1/2-3yr gap between kids.
But in saying that DD and DS are best buddies now and all of the really 'baby' sort of stuff is over. With this bub, he will be almost 3 and 2 1/2 years apart from his siblings. I think this gap will be alot easier in terms of being able to do things for bub without the other two being in the way or being so young they need the same sort of care, itms? For example, DD is a pretty independant little person. She dresses herself, feeds herself, often sleeps through the night, is toilet trained, can get things for herself (within reason!) and understands alot, and helps me a fair bit with tidying and stuff like that. DS will hopefully be toilet trained soon (possibly even before bub is here) , can mostly feed himself, he's getting better with sleeping and will hopefully be better still with sleeping when bub is born, he is no longer bfing, can understand a little and helps a little so in 3 months time, he will have more understanding again. They also play together and entertain each other so I will hopefully be able to focus on bub, with things like feeding, bathing ect...
So IMO, I think 2-3yrs is a good age for siblings to come along! Kids are more self sufficient at that age and can understand when spoken to, they're willing to help and generally do what you ask (usually!!).
It is all so very true!!! Everyone will prefer different age gaps and has different circs!
My bubby turns 1 today and I had been thinking of a 2.5 yr gap.
I am the eldest of 4 kids and have never been close to 2 of my siblings with a 3 & 4 yr gap, but my baby sister and I are very close (now,we weren't as kids) with an 8 yr gap.
I like the concept of either a gap less than 3 yrs or more than 5. After much discussion DH and I discussed that if we have them closer together they might enjoy playing together growing up (I can dream!) plus, they will then before I'm 50 and we can then enjoy life and travel!
Awww I can hear my little 1yo wake up! Time for bday celebrations!
Registered User
, can mostly feed himself, he's getting better with sleeping and will hopefully be better still with sleeping when bub is born, he is no longer bfing, can understand a little and helps a little so in 3 months time, he will have more understanding again. They also play together and entertain each other so I will hopefully be able to focus on bub, with things like feeding, bathing ect...
Reply With Quote
Bookmarks