The last few days I have been contemplating whether or not I should just pee on a stick. I know logically that I am not pregnant, but I am so wishing I was! I just need to get this off my chest. Words of wisdom defintely welcome!

I stopped taking the pill back in January. 6 months on and nothing, then I needed to go back on the pill for 2 months as I had an operation. So I've been off the pill second time round since August, 3 and a half months. Since then, my cycles have been all 34 days. (Sorry if this is all muddled). I'm 22, DH is 29. We have not been actively trying (charting cycles, 'honey I'm ovulating!' etc), but definetly not preventing it, and we DTD pretty regularly - pretty much every day except for when AF is in town.

I told myself when I stopped the pill that I know it won't happen straight away. I do know that. But I'm ****ed off that it hasn't happened. Essentially we've been TTC for 9 months. I'm 22 years old, healthy and prime baby making age, shouldn't that happen straight away, if not within 6 months? I honestly have no idea how people have 'accident' babies. How do you accidently have unprotected sex, conveniantly right when you're fertile and conceive just that one time?! It really, really annoys me. It probably shouldn't, but it does.

I have been getting ovarian cysts (2 this year), the doctor said it was just the normal follicular ovulation cyst or something, and won't affect getting pregnant. Well it seems like it is! The first one cleared itself up. The most recent, I had an ultrasound in mid September, and am supposed to go back sometime in the next couple of weeks to confirm it's gone. I really want to get that ultrasound, and have the radiologist get that funny look, ask when my last period was and tell me the cyst is gone but there's a heartbeat. I know it's not logical, my brain tells me there is no way you're pregnant, you've been ovulating and having regular periods.

Or have I? I'm slender, almost 6 foot and size 10. So I notice when my belly bulges. My belly is bulging. I look 12 weeks pregnant. People are saying I do, so it's not just in my mind. Yes, I'm probably just putting on weight, but I really really want to be pregnant.

*sigh*

I just need some sense talked into me!