Dd is 13 (today), she has a boyfriend who's 15. And aboriginal. My parents have lost their minds.

As far as they're concerned it needs to stop. Now. I need to make it stop. She's boarding at a co-ed residential college. I need to contact the school & the college & get them on my side to stop it. He's 15 & the aboriginals from *that town* are bad news.

When she first told me (I already knew), she did it in front of them. They went to work the next day & talked to everyone they worked with about it. Did the whole 'he needs to see that she isn't like so & so, who'll do what he likes. She has a family who won't stand here & say nothing'. 'You better get her on the pill'.

So I took my daughter away from them. And I actually talked to her. There are no texts between them on her phone. He has called twice over the holidays & last I looked there were 3 messages between them on facebook. There's nothing on his fb to indicate the type of kid he is (I've done my stalking). I haven't met him, but I'm not sure I even will. I don't know how many parents are actually told about their daughters first boyfriend. I didn't tell mine. For this reason.

I want to trust my daughter. I don't want to push her to hide this from me. And having them decide to keep it secret down there will just encourage them to find ways to be alone together... that's not something I'm exactly wanting. I let her know that boys his age, & girls her age, want different things, and that she's not to ever do anything she's not ok with, but I can't see her going that far. I can't put her on the pill anyway, since she doesn't have af yet.

I thought this was all over when she told my sister they were friends & that he was nice to her. They just figured she was stirring me. Today I receive a new text about it;

' Just wanted to let you know, ***** said ***** is definitely *****'s boyfriend and they 'hug really weirdly'. I might drop up to talk to them at the hostel'

I have no idea what 'hug weirdly' means. They have supervisors with them constantly at the hostel, so I can't see them doing anything exciting without someone putting a stop to it.

At dd's age my mother made me feel like I was a little tart. She actually called me that. Me wanting to go for walks all the time was me 'tarting around'. What ever the hell that meant. I didn't lose my virginity til I was bloody 17! But then I truly believe the reason I stayed with ex for so long is because of the way they were. I needed to prove that he was good enough. I don't know who she'd have preferred tbh, but his family were white trash in her eyes. I had to prove her wrong. Didn't I mess that up :/

I won't do that with my daughter. I refuse to let the same happen. I want her to know what's healthy & what's not. Rather than just saying no.

Am I wrong? Maybe I am, but if I wasn't feeling bullied & belittled by them I might feel differently.

I don't know. I just want to do this my way & not have everyone throwing their opinions at me. Making me feel like I know nothing & that I obviously can't do this alone.