Whats involved with donating your eggs?

[dusty]

There are many women/couples needing eggs for varied reasons and they may go through known or annoymous egg donation. There is a growing trend in Australia IME towards known donation which is probably for a range of reasons.

When you are considering donation you may want to think about which path you may choose. This could involve actually looking at adds in papers (Melbourne's child, major papers etc), on the internet for those seeking a donor and perhaps begin by establishing contact with a person/couple you think you may be interested in donating too. No obligations just a chat. Like Zee found on the thread CM linked, she was as nervous as the IPs (Intended Parents) but it all went well as you share common interests and passion (children and creating families). Some donors spend a long time getting to know people on internet sites before approaching possible IPs.

Unknown donation in general occurs through clinics where will be a waiting list of recipients hoping that their number comes up next. In some clinics the waiting list can be up to or longer than four years long, but people may be trying a range of paths to find their potential donor. With unknown ED the clinic do all the tests and the donor is not out of pocket as the IPs pay. In fact with all egg donation in Australia the point is to ensure there is no burden or limited burden on the donor. Payment is illegal in Australia but your reasonable costs are normally reimbursed (eg I paid for my sister's kid's childcare while she did the recent cycle etc) and you will have no medical fees to pay.

Danielle you mentioned not knowing how you would feel about 'attachment' to any resulting life that is created. We are all different in how we view life, creation and family. For many family is about love, caring, comfort and sharing a common heritage or history. For others it may be genetic or not. For my sister I think she put it so well when she said she considered donating her eggs as giving DH and I the potential to create life. That is we would create it from the cells she was able to give us.

There is also the issue of whether you wish to be a part of any resulting child's life. With known donation this is a growing phenomena but it by no means required - it is completely a personal decision for you and the IPs. When you meet or talk with IPs these are some of the things you will probably discuss. There is no right or wrong answer to any of these questions. But it is best to be true to your feelings or be at least open to exploring options you may not have thought about before. If you went through unknown donation I have heard that you can ask the clinic to ask the IP if they would be willing to meet you (before or after) and perhaps permit contact with them and the child.

The IVF process itself I described in the other thread and will copy over here for you.

The process you will go through is through IVF which involves a series of injections for about 9-12 days depending on how you respond to the drugs. There are many many women in the LTTTC threads on BB who can give you information on how to do it, what it is like, what to perhaps expect from the injections. My sister (who is my egg donor) reckons the needles are nothing at all. Especially compared to what she went through to birth her own children Something she is very proud of. In fact if you are relaxed you should feel almost nothing. Plucking your eyebrows is at least 10 times
worse. After having the injections you will have a procedure to remove the eggs from your ovaries via your vagina. Most clinics issue either a mild sedative to a twilight sedation which is like being under a short anaestetic. You will be able to go home after a few hours and rest up for a day or two.

Councelling is probably mandatory in most States you need to check with a local clinic to find the laws of your state. In our case it involved 3 sessions. One just DH and I, one my sis and her DH, and then one altogether. But in our case my BIL couldn't attend the final one due to work commitments but it was still fine to proceed. We also wrote up a letter of understanding on what and why we were doing this and what our expectations were for all scenarios we could think of. It was actually a fantastic way to find if there were any concerns or disparity in how we viewed different options.

Anyway if you have any other questions I am happy to try and answer them, but I hope this gives you a start to thinking about some of the issues.

It is an incredible gift to give, and while in my case it was my sister who donated, the donors I have come across are the most normal everyday women who have a passion to help and get much from the process and hopefully successful outcome.