Great videos Kelly thankyou for putting them up. I love Byron's "The Work" & use it daily in my own life. But I can appreciate how for some it can seem confronting.
Kaz I will try & explain what I believe she is saying. You probably watched both clips & you will see she speaks a lot about arguing with reality & also accpeting the cycle of life.

That many in our society are afraid of death because we need to be in control essentially (my words not hers). Birth & death happen & human's usually have to work very hard not to be afraid of the unknown. Many are afraid of life, where I will live, what will I do for money, what did that person mean, was he having a "go" at me? all of these little things can add up to a fear of life.
The same for death. We actually do not know where we go or what we do - if anything at all. So again it's the fear of the unknown. Just like in life.

So when we let go of the need to argue with reality. We live in acceptance. We live in what is. The more you live your life without fighting against what is the more acceptance & peace (& I believe happiness) will come to us.

So back to death. We all celebrate birth - wonderful its easy because this little perfect miracle has their whole world ahead of them. Prospects, vision etc etc. That's really a projection of what we want also.

But death requires trust and belief to embrace it. She also mentions that grief is like a tantrum. Well it can be & it often is for many. It's the reason they can treat others badly, perhaps the reason or excuse we tell our selves for crying, feeling low etc etc. It's kind of a free rein - I'm grieving so therefore it's okay I do this...

But it does depend how you look at death. If you believe that the Universe works in perfect balance & it is absolutely perfect what happened - it's hard to be really bucketed by grief. Yes, their is missing the other - but it's selfish it's for me. I for example miss Lulu's posts - but that's selfish of me! Because she died at what was (if you subscribe to this thought process/belief system) the perfect time for her. The perfect time for her children. The perfect timne for all of us.
How we process that is what's important. It is what it is. She has passed over. It was perfectly timed.
If we fight against that reality we only become unhappy, grief stricken (which I think is different to feeling sad).
Of course not everyone can apply this - and I would suggest that if this is the first time you've come in contact with the work it may be confronting with relation to death.

But basically it's seeing all that we experience as a gift. Even the really icky stuff. Through the work I personally was able to thank (not in person but feel grateful) to my exhusband, to my uncle whom was incestuous & many other situations.
Because it's just truth. It is.

As for the man in jail - I believe Byron was saying: he killed his wife because of a thought or belief that she didn't love him - but it was the hate and anger in himself that he projected on to her. He killed his wife. That is reality - but the reasons were his thoughts.

I am always totally shocked now days when people say: "I know he was meaning me or I know he said I looked gorgeous but he didn't really mean it"... Why? Isn't it less painful to just accept what is? But when there is projection it's very difficult. Projection is something we all do & it really needs to be looked at if we are to live peacefully & with what is.