I think people can change, if they want to and if they have the resources to be able to do it.
I've watched my DH turn from a bit of a player/ladies man who had never been consistently faithful to a wonderful partner (now husband) for me. He is quite open about the fact that he just had to grow up, to realise there was someone else he needed to think about and that he needed to be a better person to keep me! He is a very strong, independent and determined person and I think those were his "resources" that he drew upon. People who knew him 8 or more years ago but haven't seen the change seem surprised he is now married - I wonder what they'll think when we start having babies
On the other hand my ex was an extremely addictive personality (alcohol, pot, gambling) with what I suspect was undiagnosed bipolar disorder. From what I can see (the joys of facebook) he hasn't changed, despite having lost everything several times over. He will never change until he a) wants to and b) gets some help for the things holding him back.
Whilst I think a catalyst can help, I believe it's completely up to the individual to recognise if there is change needed. Then work to change it, if outside help is needed that's terrific but the change must come from the core of the individual.
I do think people can change, but I know of alot of people that although want to change are still stuck in the negative behaviours and can't tear themselves away.
It's too individual to cast any sort of blanket statement. Some people can give up smoking easily, some can't. Some have massive catalysts in the lives and all the help in the world but can't/won't change and others you think will NEVER change manage to do so all on their own.
I think it depends on the person. Some people can change sure, but i think the majority think they have changed but seem to resort back to the same measures when they have other influences. Things become habit and they just cant help themselves.
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