I just thought I'd talk mention this because it demonstrates to me that I'm guilty of judging by appearances too. And even now, learning how irrelevant it can be.

One of the girls who works close to me is what I would previously have described as nondescript. She isn't particularly well groomed, not particularly pretty, and not particularly 'thin' in a societal expectation of weight.

But she always has guys at work raving about her, and she's always surrounded by adoring guys. She has started dating a guy who looks like a male model just recently, who is in senior management.

Now while I didn't 'get' it, and it didn't bother me so much, I guess in the back of mind I wondered what it was about her. The other chicks at work have not been as generous and I've heard some nasty things about her in passing.

Well I had a meeting with her today. She exudes confidence, and charisma, and I 'got it'. She's not arrogant, she's not brash, she's not egotistical, she is just completely secure in herself, it felt like. It was geniunely attractive, and I completely get why a guy would find her sexy. *I* found her attractive and sexy. And until I met her, I didn't realise how much that transformed her.

I wish every woman had that. That confidence! I have lots of confidence but I actually think she had it down to a fine art, and you know what? It WORKS.