childcare for older child when on maternity leave

[Pandora]

Im going on maternity leave in late April. Ds will be close to 3 and a half.
Im in two minds about having him in daycare 1, maybe 2 days a week while I am on maternity leave. He goes 3 days a week currently, and generally likes going, so its not like he wont be used to going, and probably would not alter which days he goes but I feel like he should be home with me if im home and I'd be less of a good mum for sending him.
Has anyone else been in the postion where an older child has been in daycare when they went on maternity leave?
What did you do?

[briggsy's girl]

hun, it's prolly in Milo's best interests to keep up with Day Care while you're on mat leave. yes, you'll be home BUT you're going to have a new baby, you'llbe exhausted, he's going to need the stimulus, you'll need time with Lala...

a lot of people choose to have a day or two older child free while on mat leave

it also keeps your foot in the door at your chosen child care centre ready for when you DO go back to work

[Nai]

I'm keeping Genevieve in daycare as at the moment she is so high maintenance that I need to get some rest on the days that she is in childcare. I am not sleeping well and I just don't have the energy to keep up with her if I don't get to have a rest a couple of times a week. I don't imagine that it will get any easier once the baby arrives either.

I want to keep her in her routine as she will have to go back there when I go back to work anyway and also it is so hard to get a place that I certainly can't afford to lose it for when I return to work! Plus she has so many friends there and really does enjoy going that I think it is good that she maintains those relationships.

[MantaRay]

I left DS1 in day care 1 day a week while I was on maternity leave with DS2. One reason was to keep the spot. Another was to give myself a day with just one child so I could do things that needed going - one on one with the baby, errands, housework, rest etc (not all on the same day mind you!). I am so glad I did it - not only did DS2 and I love having a day of one-on-one time, DS1 loved having his own space for a day. He has always loved day care and used to look forward to his day out. I think it also did him a lot of good to get attention and time to do things himself without always having his brother to consider.

[AnyDream]

Much harder to get a place again if you take them out altogether. Much better to keep them in for 1 or 2 sessions a week. Plus it provides a valuable window for napping in those early weeks!

[Arimeh]

Yup I agree with everyone else.

Those 2 days a week were my sanity savers.....lol....

It was lovely taking nice long baths when very overdue, without some screaming the house down... and it was nice napping during the day....

Then when DD came along... was nice to have a day with just me and her.... to be just us girls getting to know each other.

Now he is only in care for the one day I go to work ... and I think I'm slowly going insane....

[~Kim~]

Can't add anything, but exactly what all the other girls said. I need her spot too when I go back to work.

[visitor1]

Not ever been on maternity leave.....but liek everyone else has said, keep him in care.

Ive never pulled the girls out at all and im home 24/7!

[Pandora]

cool thanks for the answers. ive been copping a lot of people telling me im horrible for thinking of it, if you cant cope with having it at home why have another one etc.
I dont know if we will need a place as hoping DH will be home once I return to work, but we may so that is a good idea as well.
I does really like it there and refers to his friends as "the boys" (we have an im only playing withboys thing happening at the moment..)

thanks again.

[alioops]

Sarah is in 2 days a week, Em is in 1 day a week. Mondays are my time and I need it every week. When Leah is down to one feed during the day and the others either being early morning and late and night I think she will go in and I will go back to work. I can easily express because I am just one who can milk like a cow. I need to go back to work, not being in work for 5 months is sending me batty!!

Lala does need some one-on-one with mummy too, so maybe keep him in one or 2 days a week, and make sure that when DH is home you have some one-on-one with DS.

[Toomanytoomany]

cool thanks for the answers. ive been copping a lot of people telling me im horrible for thinking of it, if you cant cope with having it at home why have another one etc.

Ugh!! My response to that would be, "Did you homeschool and never EVER use a babysitter? No? Shut up, then."

I'm a great believer in maintaining routines... and I also think it's nice for the new baby to have some alone time with his/her parent, too!

[Nai]

Ray, people should keep their opinions to themselves sometimes! My response (even if I never intended to go back to work) would be that the waiting list is so long we need to keep our spot. Most people who have any experience with childcare would understand that without question.

[Astrid]

I kept DD1 in care whilst pregnant and even now she still goes. When we moved mid pregnancy I gave up work and childcare. I found that after awhile she was asking to go, she really missed it. I started to send her to occasional care once or twice a week until I got a long day spot. She loved it and found it great as I could get some sleep, go to appointments etc. Once bubs arrived it was helpful for DH to have her going to childcare, as it meant he could still go to work on those days.

Really it is no-one else business how and why you continue to use childcare. As said before do these people not use kinder, school or babysitters?

[Crystalwings]

I work in LDC and also think that it is good to keep the routine happening. Can I also suggesst that you take Lala into the centre as soon as you are able for a 'show and tell' to make DS feel like she is part of the community there and to feel proud of his new sister.