Thank you everyone for posting in this thread. I am sorry to hear about all your experiences, but in a way I am glad that I am not the only one who grew up with these experiences.

My dad has pretty much openly admitted that he would rather that I worked in a profession that made him look good rather than me being happy. When I was younger, he would force me to let him help me with my homework (when I didn't need help and was fine on my own), and would get hugely offended and angry when I refused the help ("but I am doing all this for you, look how much I am helping, I am taking time out for you, and you are ungrateful for not wanting it, etc...) He also regularly plays my brothers and sister and me against each other, e.g. "did you know that H said .... about you..." (when H said no such thing), etc.

Because of growing up like this I have zero self esteem. I have had issues with anxiety (not diagnosed, but to the point that other people have pulled my up on my OCD behaviour), as well struggling with substance abuse. It is really hard for me now, as DH suffers from mental illness and a lot of the time asks unreasonable things of me (e.g. asking to drive the car when he is drunk), and if I say no (which in the above example any sane person would), I feel soooo guilty and feel like I need to make it up to him for refusing his request.

My dad also has issues with overweight people. I am in no way overweight now, but I am still not fit enough apparently, and playing and running around with DD in the park is not exercise, I NEED to go to a gym. Funny, when I actually used to go to the gym and enjoy it, my dad didn't consider that good enough either. It seemed to me that as long as it was something that I didn't enjoy, then and only then was it suitable exercise...