First kid I won't lie it is tough but sooo rewarding too! My twins where 15 months when ds3 was born and I am now pg with #4 and actually looking forward to having 4 under 4! I don't let the little things get to me. So long as the kids are dressed and feed it has being I good day!! I very rarely get to clean my entire house but it is getting easier as they get older. For a while there I couldn't even leave the room without disaster striking!! I found cooking in bulk and freezing a godsend in the led up to ds3 arrival and the first few months after. We are very laid back in this house so in the mornings I feed all the boys cereal together to cut down mess and time. Lunch is usually a sandwich or fruit. Dinner is always a cooked meal eaten at the table. I try my hardest to get my dishes done straight after dinner and a load of washing on while stripping them down for their bath. Outings can be a nightmare in my own but I just take it as it comes and am not afraid to pack up and leave the shops/zoo/friends place if all hell breaks loose. My twins have started childcare one day a week just so they can do fun things like pasting and painting which doesn't happen often here. At the end of the day it all comes together some how. Maybe you can ask at your next hospital app if there is any home help available when you get home? I went to my 26wk app yesterday and they ask that question as a standard. Also do nit be afraid to tell them about your fears of PND and use you maternal child health nurse for your own well being as well as the kids. Take care.