HI !

You sound just like i did not so long ago.

I had 2 boys with a 2.5 year gap. Second was an absolute nightmare baby !
5 years later said to my husband i wanted another one - eeeeeekkkkk !!
I guess i was over the trauma of baby number 2.
Along came baby number 3.
Now that baby number 3 is 19 months old we have decided to try again ( last one! )
I must be crazy but we feel like baby 3 will be like an only child and it would be nice for him to have a playmate. Dont know about our chance of any holidays in the next 10 years or so !
I thought i was over the longing and yearning - NOT!!!!
It is a big decision - cant believe i might have 4 kids.

Good luck - I have 3 boys. Ages 9, 6.5, 19 months.
(secretly hoping for GIRL - more than happy with another boy ! )