Having 3 kids close in age...should I do it?

[BekZ]

Hi Everyone,

I have 2 dd's Sara is 2.9 years and Loren is 8 months. DH and I have decided that we both want just one more bub and I am considering ttc sooner rather than later.

Am i insane???????

I have logical reasons for wanting another bub sooner. Firstly I want to have the next bub at least 12 months before DD1 goes to prep...Reason being I know how bad I am at getting ready in the morning now with an 8 month old. If poor Sara was going to school she would be so late everyday.

Secondly, I love the idea of my kids being close in age.

Thirdly, we are in baby mode now, no need to put the cot down!!!!

Fourthly, I want to be over baby making by 35...and I am 33.5 now!!!

[mbear]

Hey bek

Lots of your reasons were my reasons for having my 3 girls. Ive got 3 under 4.....

Going to the shops, drs, someones home, to the park....the list is endless - its a big job. When Dd#1 is at kindy i feel like its my day off....you need to plan 1 hr before you go out....seriously.
We get up at 8am at our home.....not before.....i struggle to get my oldest to kindy b4 10am !!! DH and i know its going to hit us hard next year when we have to get DD to school. I guess thats why its worked out well having DD#3 now, and not next year. Like you i dunno how i would go have a newborn and getting to school on time...

We had to buy a new car....we have plans thru to council now for an extension to our current home. We bought another cot. Our food bill is well over $300 a fortnight...the list is endless. But at the end of the day you find the money/time.

But yes, its busy, busy, busy. Sometimes i feel like i neglect my little one coz i have to pop her down whilst i make dinner, run the bath etc, etc. My mum would scream at me if she heard me saying this....she says i put every ounce of me into my girls....i dunno, maybe its mothers guilt.

Im 33 too, i wanted my children over with by 33...so guess ive achieved that goal,but a niggling part of me wants to go for a fourth...a boy maybe ????...but thats another thread.....

[BekZ]

Thanks Mbear...Don't you just hate Mother Guilt!!! DD2 hasn't been the easiest bub and everyday I feel guility for constantly telling DD1 that that mummy can't paly right now!!!I

I am so glad that I am not the only one that can't get out the door early...I try so hard but Loren is such a terrible sleeper that my best sleep is between 4am and 7am so I don't get up before 7am. Then I do get organised and Loren will poo and Sara will need to go to the toilet etc....

I know you are a great mum!!!! I guess our attempt at number 3 will be aiming for blue. But if I have a blue then I think he'll need a brother so I'll probably go for 4!!! oh geez I am way ahead. oh and my pelvic floor hates the thought of it.

Re the house, we just up graded and can fit 3. Re car...well I guess we could get 3 seat in our commodore.

Re money...well DH seems to think we'll cope. I have moments of wanting to go back to work, but I don't want to leave my girls in full time daycare.

[mbear]

he'll need a brother so I'll probably go for 4!!!

...he, he,he.....we have it all planned dont we LOL !!!!! Man, if only my DH knew what went thru my head.

Yes, i think about work too. I think about stimulating my brain a bit.....but i realise how quickly they grow up...i cant believe my baby is 1 next month !!!!! To me she still looks like the baby she was the day she was born...(well....maybe slightly bigger LOL).

It sounds to me like youve made your decision. HAve fun with it, great if you have a boy, perfect if you have 3 girls......you will wonder 'what if' at night should you not try for #3, rather than 'gosh why did i have 3?'.....KWIM ????

When you do 'being TTC' hollar my way, i will need to keep an eye on your TTC journal....i have NFI how to make a boy LOL......

[BekZ]

Mbear - We will probably ttc from December onwards....no idea on the boy making either....I will let you know my progress

[Willow]

Gawd, you're brave Bek!! No way am I ready. I'm not getting enough sleep as it is, let alone with 3!! LOL.

Good on you though, I understand your thinking. I always wanted 3 but seriously doubt it will happen now.

[joshnchloesmummy]

Hi bek

it's a hard decision, one that we are currently trying to make as well.... my dd is currently 10 months and the current plan is to wait until she turns 2 to start ttc. I would like to start sooner but we already have a short age gap (18 mo) and my dh would like a bigger gap this time. I think it's hard either way there is no perfect age gap.

[BekZ]

Christina - I agree that all age gaps bring different challenges. I have friends and family who have short age gaps (18 months) and long (longest being 5 years) and they have all had their challenges.

[Willow]

Willow - If Loren was a good sleeper I'd be ttc now!!!! but I am waiting a bit longer and crossing my fingers that she'll magically sleep well

I'm hearing you babe. It makes it hard. We had a bad night here last night and although I desperately want another one, I really don't know if I could cope with this again! LOL. If you could guarantee me a sleeper, I'd sign up tomorrow.

[Phteven]

I guess it depends on your coping skills.
I have 2 and it stretches me to my limit so I wouldn't try for number 3. Although part of me thinks a daughter would be nice I don't think it would be fair on my boys or DH or even myself to TTC a child when I'm fairly sure that I would find myself depressed and overwhelmed after its arrival.
If an oopsie baby happened of course I would find a way to cope but I would be struggling.

[~Aveta~]

having had my twins 6 years after their paternal half-brother was born, and my youngest 3yrs 9mnths later, when he was 12, and being the youngest of one sis 9yrs 8mnths older and other 2 yrs 8mnths older, i personally would say go for having them as close as you can cope with!!! but that's just my opinion, as a mum trying for another when my youngest turned 16 today

[BekZ]

Dachlostar - I have a niggly feeling that I may not cope with 3 right at this moment. If I start to get some decent sleep then I know I can cope. Plus my body has not fully recovered from having 2 kids in 2 years. I still have to get fit and lose some weight. Unfortunately I am not one who strings back into shape after having a baby....
Good on you for knowing your limit.

Dragonfly - Happy birthday to your son. I just read your ticker...all the best with testing