I don't think I would manage without a cleaner every week to be honest. Basically all I need to do is tidy things as we go -- toys, activities, stack the dishwasher as things are used (and then run it after she is in bed) and a load of washing every few days (it is just me and her). It never felt manageable without a cleaner, especially now she is a non-stop toddler who doesn't nap during the day. The cleaners come on Friday so things are nice for the weekend and they do kitchen, bathroom, floors, dusting.. it is fantastic, really. If you can afford it, I would definitely consider it... to me time > money but I know things can be tight and consider this one of my 'luxury' purchases. As for cooking meals, it isn't toooooo bad with just the one DD and now that she is of an age to help.. I get cherry tomatoes so she can toss those in, she will pick the lettuce leaves, crumble the cheese... I do try to cook things that I know there is something she can help with and we also usually have our main mean during the day because it suits us both better. My 'break' to quickly sort out anything left over to do during the day is Playschool, it is also her "rest" time because she doesn't have a nap, I usually put an episode on a bit after lunch and that's when I tidy the kitchen from that and breakfast and prep anything big that needs doing for dinner.

The other good trick for keeping a place tidy is spend heaps of time outside of it haha. We have a pool so usually swim every 2-3 days but it isn't heated so that will be phasing out soon, we paint with water on the outside tiles, run around, dance (portable music players are great), walk to the shops or park, chase the cats, I got a $3 tub of mixed animals that live outside, any sort of waterplay is pretty easy/mess free (just change clothes if they get too wet) -- just grab spoons, containers, jugs from the kitchen and that keeps her busy for ages.

But it really is completely normal to feel swamped, I do feel flat-out all day, all week.. and that is with a cleaner and one toddler! Parenting is full-on, non-stop I don't think anyone really has it all together.