Just wodnering how many others are out there? I don't come across many mums in the workforce who have partners raising their kids, and seeing as this is going to be our situation soon (I start next week, and we'll bother be working part-time for the next 3 weeks, then I have 4 weeks 'off' while the center is shut, and then as of mid-January I'll be the working mum, and Shel is going to be the SAHM).
How many others are there? I'm a bit overwhelmed by how quick it's all happened! I'm ecstatic (despite having the guilts put on me by some people who think I'm 'abandoning my duty' ), but worried a little about Shel. I think she'll do great but I'm not sure how to help her 'settle in' to the roll... she's never had to look after Jazz by herself for more than 2 hours at a time and I think she really underestimates how much work it is. Any advice?
Any advice for me? Seeing as I'll be studying, I'm really worrying I thinkabotu coming home and still falling into being 'mum' as well... like coming home and cooking etc. Because that's just how its always been since Shel and I got together. It's a total shake-up of roles!
Anyway, i just thought it'd be nice to chat to other mums who go out to work
I'm in the same boat as you, Leash. It's coming, but hasn't started yet. As of the end of January I'll be back at work full time while DH stays home with Sam. I'm looking forward to it in some ways, but in other ways I'm terrified. I wonder what will happen when Sam gets those bumps that only a mummy cuddle can fix... I'm tending to sit back on the weekends (necessary on Saturdays anyway) and let DH do the work and see if he can fix whatever it is that is wrong or figure out what Sam needs/wants at any particular time... It's hard, but probably best to go through this now than to drop them both in at the deep end.
On another note - my Aunt was a working mum while her husband stayed at home with the children, and my cousins have turned out ok and my uncle did a great job. I know it can be done, it's just a shame my uncle has passed away now - it would have been great to be able to talk to him about it.
I work full time while my partner is the stay at home dad. The reasons for that were because I earn alot more, he can run his business from home and he wanted to be a stay at home dad. In fact both our dads were the main carers so it's normal for us. He's not the best at cleaning so we got a cleaner but he does all the cooking as I hate it and I get home too late in the evening.
We did it for 6 months last year, and are doing it again as of tomorrow. It's really interesting being in the other partner's shoes and realising that neither role is easy LOL!
for us DH has been the SaHP since July, that's when Pip was pulled out of full-time creche to 2 days/week only. How he's dealt with it really is how I dealt with having a bub! Staying at home until feeling comfortable at home with everything, then short trips out then longer ones involving nappy change! He's just getting to feeding him out ...
As for chores, I still cook (cause it relaxes me) but he does the cleaning / washing / shopping which makes everything easier.We discussed division of chores before he started being SaHD!
I went back to work full time at the start of November and DH is a SAHD.
Its very different. I wonder how he gets the housework done as I never could with velco baby.
Rayray I wonder the same thing I could never get a lot done but DH is a domestic goddess! LOL But I was more social than him and went out a lot more.
I think Leesh leaving Shell alone with Jaz for a whole day like the hours you'll be at work is a something to try?. Where she can call you if she is struggling and you can come back if you HAVE to which you may not be able to when you start your job.
TBH I struggled with it at first, I was jealous and didn't want to go but once I got into the swing of work it has made me appreciate DD so much more. I enjoy her more now I think..is that bad? Its good you are going into your new job with excitment, you will be busy leanring new things that might help keep your mind off worrying about home.
It really is good for both parents to have a stint being the primary care giver I feel. It really is an eye opener. DH said to me today when they picked me up from the train he was "over" DD today I remember saying that to him at some stage
DH goes back to work in Feb and DD will go to FDC I am quite sad, its been good for all of us.
Mums who work, while the partners are SAHPs
), but worried a little about Shel. I think she'll do great but I'm not sure how to help her 'settle in' to the roll... she's never had to look after Jazz by herself for more than 2 hours at a time and I think she really underestimates how much work it is. Any advice?
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But I was more social than him and went out a lot more.
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