thread: Not sure Im done - how do you know?

  1. #1
    Registered User

    Dec 2005
    4,840

    Not sure Im done - how do you know?

    So after 2 stressful TTC and pregnancy journeys (involving fertility treatment, pre eclampsia and pre term labour scares) I thought I was done having babies for numerous reasons and DH agreed. But deep down I feel like Im not finished having children yet - but I am so over being pregnant with all my problems. I always planned on having 4 or 5 and when DH and I got married we agreed we'd play it by ear and reasses after each baby. I have two boys now (15mths apart) that I love and adore, but I feel like there is someone missing from our family. Dh is adamant that we are done and wont even contemplate the idea of *possibly* having another baby in a few years when the boys are in preschool because he feels thats too much of a gap (and because he thinks it would be too stressful).

    How did you know you were complete as a family of 3/4/5 etc?

    Oh and this has nothing to do with not having a daughter, as much as I would be happy if this hypothetical third baby was a girl Id be just as stoked with another handsome boy.

  2. #2
    DoubleK Guest

    i cant offer much advice really... but deep down if you feel something is missing, maybe you do need another child!!

    i know this is off topic... but a friend of mine went to see a clairvoyant, who told her there is another baby waiting if she wants it.... she had thought she was done with 3 kids..but now she is contemplating having her fourth...

    i hope you come to a decision that both you and your DH are happy with!

  3. #3
    Registered User

    May 2004
    Shepparton
    4,871

    Gee Anna, I am clucky as all heck at the moment!! LOL
    I suppose you need to take everything into account; money, lifestyle, future plans etc.

    But as for know when you are done, I can't help, LOL

  4. #4
    Registered User

    Jan 2008
    SE suburbs, Vic
    1,377

    My SIL had her two boys 14 months apart, they are now 5 & 6. They decided later on they wanted another and my niece is now 16 months, so there is 3 and a bit years differnce between her and the 5 yr old. SIL said her family is now completed

  5. #5
    Life Member

    May 2003
    Beautiful Adelaide!
    2,877

    I was done at 2. I felt totally complete. No cluckiness AT ALL.

    Then I found I was accidentially pg with Lexie.

    Now I cannot imagine life without her.

    And am as clucky as all wotsits for another!

    Sorry. I am no help am I??!

  6. #6
    Registered User
    Add aussienic on Facebook

    Feb 2005
    Boyne Island
    6,327

    I went through this after our 3rd son Jacob. I just didn't feel "done" Dh was adamant we were and wasn't budging. I was certain when I was pregnant I was done but changed my mind when Jacob was a few months old. Anyways after a fair bit of discussion we decided to try for one year and if i wasn't pregnant then we woud have another talk.. Thankfully 9 months later I fell pregnant and along came Olivia..

    I agree it has nthing to do with not having one of a certain sex. I am the same.. Although I am lovin the girl thing lol.. but if she had been a boy we would have been more then happy as well

  7. #7
    Registered User

    Feb 2005
    144

    .....
    Last edited by River; February 18th, 2008 at 11:36 AM.

  8. #8
    Registered User

    Dec 2005
    Melbourne, Vic
    4,338

    Anna, remember too you are still quite young so you have plenty of time down the track for more.
    Maybe wait few years and see how things are going, maybe by then your hubby will be open to the idea. And if he is worried bout too much of a gap guess you'll have to have another 2