Reply With Quotemy parents called both sets of my grandparents mum and dad unless they were present together and then it was only mum and dad for the "actual" parent if that makes sense.
i call my inlaws by their first name as does my DH wrt my parents.
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What do you call your MIL?
Ok, I mean besides 'that cranky old cow who disagrees with everything I say"! Lol just kidding
I just call my inlaws by their first names, and DH is the same with my parents. Growing up, my parents were the same. My dance teacher, she and her DH both call both sets of parents Mum & Dad - I never could tell who was whose actual parents. My Mum was pretty opinionated about it, she thought it was ridiculous and that you should never call anyone but your own parents Mum & Dad.
That seems to have changed now though! My Nana (Mum's Mum) passed away two and a half years ago. Mum really didn't handle it well - especially as her sister passed away only three months earlier. It was a rough time. Anyway, she has now taken to calling my other Nana Mum. I'm thinking it's because she doesn't have her own mum anymore, but it's a complete backflip. They never got on *that* well, but now there are loads of FB status updates and messages between the two, both referring to Nana as "Mum" and how much she loves her.
Should I talk to my Mum? I mean just seeing as though she was always so against the idea, could it be that she's really missing her own mum or something? It could be nothing, or could it mean something more? It seems to me like she's trying to replace her own mum
Registered User
my parents called both sets of my grandparents mum and dad unless they were present together and then it was only mum and dad for the "actual" parent if that makes sense.
i call my inlaws by their first name as does my DH wrt my parents.
Registered User
I call my MIL by her first name. Although now that we have had kids I tend to call the Nan and Pa half the time as I'm referring to them in front of the kids and its easier.
I was seeing a guy ( long term relationship) and they expected me to call them Mum and Dad, and I honestly just couldn't do it, it didn't feel at all right and must say I got annoyed that they expected me too. Hence to say that relationship didn't last.
Senior Moderator
The outlaws.
Well they did call me the d e f u c k t o.... to my face, in public...
They were really good to me (even after separation) until the XH moved in with them and it all became too hard.
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Far out Divvy, that's horrible! I wouldn't blame you for any choice names that got thrown back their way!
Yeah that's the thing Megs, I can only imagine the reaction I'd get if I started calling my inlaws Mum & Dad - it wouldn't go down well!! That and like you, I just wouldn't feel comfortable with it
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I use first names.
Registered User
First names as DH does to mine.
Registered User
i use first names... i know one of my sil's calls her mil mum... i just can't do it ... i have a mum already.
Registered User
craazy lady!
oh, i mean i use her first name.
Registered User
I call them by their first names. Even though mum is no longer with us I could never call MIL "mum" She isn't my mum.
Registered User
I shudder every time i think of her name, so I don't say it at all... " " is exactly what she is.
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By their first names. My partner calls my parents the same. I love my in-laws to bits, but I only have ONE mother and father...
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But I think it's only because her own mum has passed that she's now calling her MIL 'mum' - she never did before, and I don't think she would if her own mum was still here. That's what gives me the impression that she's kind of replacing her
i call mil by her first name.. she refers to herself in regards to me as mum, i think its weird, shes not my mum!!!
Registered User
I call them their first names, I've done this since DH and I got married, which I still find weird because I called them MR and MRS... for the 6 years before we were married! Everyone else calls them mum and dad but I just found it too weird!
Registered User
By their first names. I was dating my DH for 7 years before we got married, so I didn't see the point of changing it to 'mum & dad' b/c I was so used to calling them by their first names & honestly, like many others have said I only have one mum & dad. My DH is the same, he calls his step-mum by her first name b/c he wasn't raised by her.
My gf calls her inlaws mum & dad and it confuses the crap outta me - I can't follow the conversation!
Registered User
Yep by their first names as df does to mine, I get along with my ILs very well but agree that sometimes they can be a giant, opinionated PITA! I would maybe have a friendly chat to your mum and see where she's at, there sounds like there could be something deeper, but at the same time if it's helping her it might not be a bad thing
BellyBelly Member
I call my in laws mum and dad, and DH calls my mother mum too - I don't see calling my Mother in law mum as somehow diminishing the relationship I have with the woman who gave birth to me - I just see it as honouring that idea of family - they might be only my adopted family but they are family nonetheless. That being said, I know I'm most probably in the minority of daughter in laws who love and like my in laws - same with DH. I'm so strange we're even planning on buying a farm together when they retire and putting three houses on it, one for us, one for them and one for my mum - our own little commune.
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