Teenager's Help With One-Year-Old

[fionas]

It's looking increasingly likely that my 15-year-old DSD will be coming to live with DP, me and what will be our 12-month-old DD.

While I will still be DD's primary carer, I do think teenagers should pitch in too as part of the family.

I'm just wondering what other families have seen as appropriate help with siblings ie. do you ask them to give a bottle here and there, change a nappy occasionally, play with siblings while you're cooking dinner etc. etc.

I don't want her to feel like she's an unpaid nanny but equally a bit of help here and there is all part of being a family IMO.

[*charmalea*]

i think she will love the chance to play and look after her , she will feel a bit more part of the family and that you trust her ... if she doesnt take to it straight away , give her time ,shes probably just adjusting to new family life .... as long as you dont leave the bub with her when shes going out or busy she wont feel like an unpiad nanny!!!

GL .

[Chocaholic]

As she is 15 years old, she is old enough for you to negotiate with her. Treat her like an adult and respect her opinions. She will love it and probably feel more like a loved and respected member of the household.

Discuss what you think is important around the house generally (i.e. she must help with the housework, keep room clean, cook one night a week etc) and ask if she is willing to help out with DD. I am sure she will say yes and then discuss what she is willing to do. Tell her that she is not an unpaid babysitter or slave and if she ever feels like she is doing to much around the house then she needs to talk to you ASAP.

Make sure you communicate with her openly and treat he like an adult. At 15, she is not far off it and if she knows that you believe she is trustworthy and an important member of the household, she is more likely to behave that way.

Good luck

[Lisa]

My 14 yr old son does things for me without being asked, more because he adores his little brother like nothing else!
The things I do ask him to do is to entertain Harrison whilst I am cooking/cleaning etc, and to strip Harrison's clothes off him to ready him for a bath at night. James usually chooses outfits for Harrison and Madeleine doesn't mind changing nappies, as long as they aren't pooey ones! lol

[Nai]

What better way to encourage safe sex in a teenager than by making them change a pooey nappy but seriously at 15 she should already be responsible for her own chores around the house where she currently lives. They may be different ones to those at your place but if you and DP set the ground rules up front then there are no surprises.

Like Courtney said, if you tell her what is expected in terms of household chores then she is old enough to be responsible to complete them. You can also let her know that you want to encourage her to bond with and have a relationship with her little sister and with that in mind she needs to look after her like a big sister. Sometimes that means looking after her while you do things like cook dinner, sometimes it is playing with her and sometimes it might be dressing her etc. I think most teenage girls would be happy enough enough to spend some time with a baby, especially their half sister.

[Kitt3n]

What better way to encourage safe sex in a teenager than by making them change a pooey nappy .

ha ha LOL!!

Chances are she will love being with the little one, unless she has already shown an aversion to it?

Also i am guessing that it is partly her choice to be coming to live with you, i hardly expect that she wouldn't want to pitch in with the little one, she is old enough to understand?