Things you never want to hear your children say.

[Glamourcide]

It's the silence that's a big problem in this house - it never bodes well.

DD1's expanding vocabulary now allows her to inform me when she's done 'p!ss' (thanks for teaching her that, DH) or 'poo' - always *after* the event instead of before, and usually somewhere on the floor.
'Broken' usually means she's destroyed something of mine or DH's, and 'Broken' preceeded by a high-pitched squeal means she's destroyed something of her own (two nights ago it was her precious plastic headband she got in a showbag, she was distraught for hours).

'Eggies!' usually means she's dragged the carton out of the fridge and chances are she's smashed at least one on the floor (she loves boiled eggs and attempts to make her own).
This scenario also applies to, well, her announcing any food item out loud - bread, mookie (milk), maninamite (Vegemite), corn cakes (corn thins), etc etc. Food = mess.

And, I'm forever grateful to DH for teaching her 'c' word. Yup. *That* 'c' word.

[*Ash*]

I know its bad when I hear DD yelling 'oh no look what (DS) has done, it's really bad'. When I heard that tonight, DS had tipped a full bottle of shampoo and a half bottle of body wash down the shower while showering with DD. And I thought DH was supervising them! Unfortunately, the stuff wasn't even ours. My mum left it here after a recent visit. oops...

[*Ali*]

Just today while I was in the toilet and DD was doing some 'making' (craft) I hear, oh its shorter- doesnt matter, I called out "whats shorter Tori?" and the came the reply I was dreading "just my hair mum!"
Luckily not much damage with her kiddie scissors, I think she might have only snipped a few strands, butneedless to say the scissors are now all out of reach.

[Tinks]

1. I'm burning down the house mum (while I was on a teleconference when working from home). The good news - he wasn't really, he was playing with the hose and pretending there was a fire he was putting out. The bad news - there were managers from all over Qld on the teleconference and they all heard!

THis is sooo funny only because my nephew actually DID burn the house down!!

[Michelle71]

Just today while I was in the toilet and DD was doing some 'making' (craft) I hear, oh its shorter- doesnt matter, I called out "whats shorter Tori?" and the came the reply I was dreading "just my hair mum!"
Luckily not much damage with her kiddie scissors, I think she might have only snipped a few strands, butneedless to say the scissors are now all out of reach.

PMSL I am soooooo sorry but that is so very funny. I have visions of my DS cutting DD's hair when it gets longer and the neighbours 3yo recently cut her own fringe ultra short so there is precedence.