hello all

Sorry if I am posting this in the wrong section...

What am I doing wrong? I just feel like I am not coping at the moment. I feel like the two eldest children (DS1 nearly 4 and DS2 just 2) never ever listen to me and I feel like I do so much for them (take them here and there - the parks, walks, shows, do cooking, etc etc ? the list goes on) and I never get anything in return except they seem to want more more more. I know they are totally reliant on me and this is what a parent does for their children but I dont know I kind of feel unappreciated and like I am beating my head againsts a brick wall.

I am going out of my head with the fact they never listen (well they do listen but today they didnt and we were out in public and all I wanted to do was curl up into a ball and cry). I think this all stems from the fact we went out today to a really busy kids event and I felt like I was chasing after them the entire time and it has worn me out and I felt stressed and wasnt able to enjoy it at all.

I feel like I am the only one who isn?t coping ? that it must be me. Everyone else seems to have the mothering thing down pat except me.

I worry I am scarring the children when I have a melt down like I just did(I kind of popped when we got home). I know they are just kids so am I expecting too much to have them listen and follow instructions?

I am making them out to be devil children and they aren?t at all - I think it is more me just feeling flat and stressed about life. The eldest one in particular is pretty easy going but it just seems than when they get together it makes for crazy times - but maybe my expectations of them are too high??

It doesn?t help that DS2 is not sleeping well at all at the moment so I am tired and just worn down by his behaviour at night.

I am feeling very very woe is me at the moment and I detest feeling like this as I know it doesn?t help anyone but I cant pull myself out of the doldrums.

Does anyone else feel like things are out of control, that their children never listen? I feel stressed all of the time and like I am sinking - well not all of the time but definitely today.

Gosh I am sorry for pouring all this out but if I didn?t do it on here my DH would have copped it.

I am just so worried that I am a bad parent and maybe the fact I am feeling to woe is me it isn?t helping the situation.

Don?t get me wrong we have some great times, but just right now I feel very sad and stressed.

I know this doesnt make a lot of sense so if you ahve gotten this far well done and thanks for reading.
Sorry for all of this.
Jem