It's a slow process, moving on from the guilt.

There was just no way my body was going to produce milk after Samuel's birth. When we hit two weeks of pumping and were still only getting dribbles of colostrum...

I did feel terribly guilty at first. But it's not like I chose faulty breasts - my medical conditions made them faulty and I didn't choose to be ill, either!

I also had to make the decision to continue trying to BF or to medicate my arthritis properly. It came down to a choice of continuing to work towards feeding my son, or being able to hold him and cuddle him and care for him in all other ways.

I have mostly moved on now, 13 months later.

It can still randomly attack when I read things such as expressed donor milk being a better option than formula. But where were the people lining up to offer me donor milk?

BW