Ok, I'll try and clarify a bit. Bfing is recommended for a minimum of 2 years mostly because of the things in breastmilk that can't be sourced elsewhere - immunity factors, stem cells, etc etc, not because of the calcium content. The nutrients in bm are all a baby needs for the first 6 months - at some time around the 6 month mark, babies start to require more nutrients than they get from bm, which is why the recommendation from 6 months is to continue bfing as well as supplement with solids.
When a baby is weaned from the breast, or a ff baby reaches around 12 months, they don't need the bm/formula to be replaced by cows' milk, and as has been mentioned already, in many cultures it isn't - Asia is a primary example of this. In Australia we generally do it because it's what we know, and as a result most of our diets are based on the fact that we get the bulk of our calcium requirements from dairy. But we don't need to get any of our calcium requirements from dairy, as long as we are getting it from the rest of the diet, which is most certainly possible. There are many peopIe who do not eat dairy, including vegans. I suggested a dietician to assist, because this is the best way to ensure that he is getting enough. You can also check out this site which is a handy guide to the calcium content of non-dairy foods: Vegetarian Network Victoria - Complete Nutrient Summary
BW, you might not be comfortable to take the non-dairy path, and that's fine. I'm just letting you know that the option is there. At 12 months many kids are not eating a big variety of foods, so while I know it is stressful (my DS1 was the worst eater at that age), it is not uncommon, and kids do seem to survive it. I did find a paediatric dietician was a huge help when his eating was still really bad at about 15 or 16 months. Vitamin drops can help fussy eaters - not just by providing nutrients but they can also stimulate appetite. This was one thing that worked for us. Toddler milks unfortunately tend to have the opposite effect, and reduce the appetite so they are not such a good option for trying to ensure that the baby is getting enough nutrients until they are eating better.
I hope this has made my previous post a little clearer.
Have just been googling non-dairy sources of calcium (the things you do when heat and redback spider colonies stop you from sleeping!) and I have to say that there really isn't a lot of stuff on the list that Sam eats yet. I can work on it - but we won't be stopping the bottles in a hurry. I've only very recently got him to drop from 4 to 3 bottles each day. While he does enjoy his food and gets very grumpy if he doesn't get enough - he's also much the same with his bottles.
BW hun, I have only skimmed this thread. This is a tricky stage you're at, I sympathise .
True Lactose intolerance is quite rare, it is more likely that Sam has some sort of Cows Milk Protein Intolerance. In fact, given that he reacts to cheese and yoghurt, but not his formula, I'd say it's more than likely.
Your best best to sort this out is to seek the opinion of an experienced Dietician or Naturopath, who specialises in this area. I could try to help you find someone in Sydney if you are interested.
In the meantime, I would persist with the Nan, but you can always drop the amount he has. MR has written some excellent stuff for you about the necessity (or lack of) dairy in our diets, and what you can replace it with. Given that you are concerned about Sam's diet, a dietician might be a really helpful way for you to go. And there are always Calcium/Magnesium supplements available! But best to start down that road under an experienced advisor.
Having BTDT, I know how hard it is, and how hard it gets if you persist with the dairy......not worth it. Because I was so lost for somewhere to go, I waited too long to get DS diagnosed, and as a result, 2008 was an unhappy year for us. Life is definitely on the up now we know what the deal is . And hey, it might not turn out to be that at all for Sam! But best to know for sure what you're dealing with .
ETA Something else you may be interested in......exposing a person who has intolerances to the very things they are intolerant to, over a period of time, will weaken their immune system. The body is so busy fighting these proteins it doesn't cope with, it doesn't have the strength it should to fight regular bugs etc. As an example, over 6 months in 2008 DS had moderate/severe croup SIX times . It was ridiculous, and awful. I was most concerned about this winter. But having changed his diet, he only had one moderate bout, which was a vast improvement (I was assured this would happen after removing the offending proteins from his diet). Knowing your history, I thought that was something you might want to note
Last edited by Janie; December 17th, 2009 at 09:48 PM.
Thanks, Janie. Interesting to note that about the immune system. It's got me wondering whether it's something like that which triggered mine to go haywire and start attacking me. Sam's been quite healthy so far (just one bout of bronchiolitis, everything else I can trace back to teething), so I'm not overly concerned that we're exposing him to stuff that bothers him. But the more I hear, the more I'm thinking that I won't mess with what's working just yet.
BW there is certainly no rush to stop giving a 12 month old formula especially if they are not good eaters. My recommendation would be to offer food first and keep offering new foods. Then as Sam starts eating more, slowly reduce his formula intake. You need not cut out a full bottle, just reduce the quanity. Alternativley you could start to give him his formula in a sippy cup. You'll find he drinks a lot less then a bottle. Certainly keep the bottles going for sleep time comfort and special cuddles but offer the sippy cup at other times. Don't stress if he doesn't finish these either.
I think as long as you are aware that you want Sam to eat food instead of rely on bottles then you'll be fine.
I haven't been online for a few days so sorry if this thread is old now - someone asked why not skim milk? It's because skim milk (other than not having enough calories and fat for small kids) has concentrated levels of protein and sodium that puts too much strain on under 2's kidneys. But once off isn't going to hurt his kidneys if it's just a trial of the milk KWIM.
I wouldn't worry if he's not dropping his bottles fast- I have just increased DD's bottles from 3 to 4 because she was not eating more, started waking at night again and hadn't put on weight for 2 months. If we're truly going to follow our instincts or baby-led ideals - then this includes bottles for non-breastfeeding bubs. All bubs develop at their own pace after all, we can't force them to eat more? I wouldn't force the issue if DD was still breastfeeding - don't really see the difference. You'd expect a gradual transition.
It's true that you can source enough calcium from other sources other than dairy, as it is you can source enough b vitamins, zinc, iron from non-meat sources - the reason they are highly emphasized by nutritionists is because they are a concentrated, good source of those essential vitamins and make it easy to get our daily requirements. Vegans & vegetarians have to watch their diets very carefully to ensure they are getting enough nutrients (I am not having a go at them, I was one for 5 years so did it) if you don't buy into the dairy is evil hype - and you establish he's not allergic - then don't feel badly about giving him cows milk or cows milk formula if he thrives on it. Hope evreything works out for you
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. And hey, it might not turn out to be that at all for Sam! But best to know for sure what you're dealing with 
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. It was ridiculous, and awful. I was most concerned about this winter. But having changed his diet, he only had one moderate bout, which was a vast improvement (I was assured this would happen after removing the offending proteins from his diet). Knowing your history, I thought that was something you might want to note 
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