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Thread: Narrow Minded Ignorance!

  1. #19

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    Congratulations!!!

    I feel so sad that someone that has been close to you and supported you, would turn the cheek and say something like that. Maybe it was just the shock as she did not know that you were TTC, but that really is no excuse, she probably does feel that way as she said it.
    I think that you should have a chat with her and explain your feelings and see how she responds. You obviously have had a great realtionship in the past, hopefull this wont change and she will become more accepting as time goes on.



    Congratulations again and enjoy your pregnacy together

  2. #20

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    congratulations, mummies!

  3. #21

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    Here's some narrow minded ignorance for you - opening this thread was blocked by my work proxy server due to its "content" !!! GRRR

  4. #22

    Default Understanding and ignorance.

    This is hard to write and I so hope not to offend anyone as I believe everyone has right to live thier life the way they choose.
    My brother (who is also my closest friend) came "out" almost two years ago. As a family we all had an idea, but the time had to be right for him. I love him as much as ever and am very proud of him. My frustration is I have no concept of what it would be like to be in a same sex relationship. I struggle to understand the whole concept. I think sometimes such lack of understanding may be seen as ignorance. However I would support him and any other same sex couple infact any couple to persue thier dreams no matter what.
    My DD was born last year and my brother was my birthing buddy he and his partner are wonderful loving uncles to my DD.
    I hope this makes some sense. Could it be that the people involved in some of these situations just don't understand but still love the people just the same?????????

  5. #23

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    Good luck with your pregnancy. I have no idea why people can't be more supportive and les judgemental of others. I wish you and your wife all the best.

  6. #24

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    jmmum..... I defiantely wouldn't see that as ignorance. Most people who identify as gay/lesbian/bi understand that it does differ from traditional families, and we (most of us, there are exceptions but Shel and I are not them ) also understand that it might be difficult to grasp, that you'll probably have questions about the way things will work when we parent etc. Not knowing isn't ignorance... Well we don't see that as ignorance... theres not really an opportunity to know or find out the answers to those questions unless a GLBTI person explains it to you. Don't hesitate to ask BTW, I prefer people to ask than just assume they know when they might not. To me asking shows that you have a great deal of respect for the people you are asking, as you want to know and you don't want to go around assuming.

  7. #25

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    Default Create you own family

    Hi guys

    I understand your feelings with this.
    My Partners parents/family are not too thrilled that we are together. They prefered that she stayed single so they don't have proof that she is gay.
    We have a two year old daughter ( I am biological mum) and although she says she loves her i know that if a biological grandchild came along Sarah would be forgotten.

    Don't listen to them - they may be family but you are creating your own family with values you hold dear. Don't let anyone make you feel inferior - you need your positive thoughts for you baby and your "created" family.

    Belinda and Jeanette

  8. #26

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    Okay, leasha, at the risk of not putting this correctly, while I don't have any qns regarding how you would parent as a same sex couple (from what I've seen parenting styles differ enormously among any couple, regardless of gender) but I have often wondered why both parents choose to be called 'mum' or 'dad', rather than using a pet term that would differentiate each of them. Does that make sense? Not that I believe one is mum and the other is not, and I'm sure the child doesn't get confused, but it kinda struck me as odd that both parents would be called the same thing. I'm more thinking of it in terms of the fact that we don't call both grandmothers 'grandma', one is 'grandma' and one is 'nana', so they are each distinctive.

    ??? Is this a stupid qn???

  9. #27

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    No question is stupid.

    Well, Shel and I are using different names, kind of like you do with Nana and Grandma (I'm Mumma, and Shel's Mummy..... we are expecting it'll probably turn into 'ma' and 'me' but we'll just see how it works). Because we each wanted something different so theres no confusion when we're called.

    I know of people who both use mum, and I think thats really confusing, just like I think calling both grandmothers nana is confusing (my SIL does that and even I get confused at who she's talking about lol). I don't really know why some people use mum for both, though sometimes it's just that that's what their child decided to call them IYKWIM.

    Basically, I can't answer you're question because Shel and I both wonder that as well... we don't want to be called the same thing anyway (mainly because I want to be able to go "you're turn, she's calling you!" ).

    Hope someone can answer your question!

  10. #28

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    Default Whats in a name???

    We did something completely different.

    I am "mummy" and my partner Jeanette is "deddy" NOT daddy
    her nickname is "neddy" and my mother in her infinate insanity suggested "deddy" (a combination of daddy and neddy) and it really grew on us - most people get it and the others well .... they are not close enough to cause trouble.
    It has really worked for us but we have also had a lot of family support (my family) which has been fantastic.

    You've got to do what you feel comfortable with

    Belinda and Jeanette

  11. #29

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    Oh MummyTwo I am so sorry you had to listen to this. Sadly, there are many memebrs of the community who are stuck in their 'anal' ways of thinking as to what 'classifies' as family. Children need parent who will love, protect and nurture them, as a minimum! That family is no longer just mum, dad, and kids, Familys now come in so many different forms, two women, two men, one woman, one man, grandparents etc....I firmly believe that as long as that child is receiving those basic elements to grow and thrive in love and security, it doesnt matter who makes up the constitution of the parents. Hope that wasnt too confusing....i think i have juts confused myself!!! LOL

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