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Thread: In the car - how?

  1. #1

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    Default In the car - how?

    We had a 30-40 minute drive home yesterday, and my poor little man was sooo upset the whole way home. How on earth do you comfort him when you're both strapped into your seats? He's usually so good in the car, but I have a feeling it was made worse that I was sitting next to him in the back (mum was with us and had the front seat) and I'm sure it was coz he couldn't understand why he wasn't getting cuddled



    I'm -almost- tempted to have a dummy on hand in the car for these times that I simply can't pick him up and comfort him the way I normally would. It was awful seeing him so upset. Btw.. it's physically impossible for me to even attempt feeding him while we're going along! lol. Believe me, if I could.. I would! My little bbs would never reach! My SIL managed it with her kids. LOL.

    Any suggestions? I'm really trying hard not to use a dummy at all, and I've been successful so far (much to my mum's frustrations.. she wants that dummy out of the drawer!)

  2. #2

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    The only way we ever solve the problem was to pull over, calm him down then keep going....

  3. #3

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    I don't know of any solution except pulling over. If a dummy works that migt do the trick.
    I'm trying to figure out how your SIL managed to feed. Does she have really big (.)(.) ?

  4. #4

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    Ivana - I really feel for you, I hate drives like that. I found what triggered for Maggie was being hungry. Can you give Tallon a quick feed before longer trips? Other than that pulling over is the only thing that can be done without resorting to a dummy. Anyway a dummy will only work if Tallon is happy to take one. Oh another idea is if he takes a bottle of EBM, then take a small one in the car with you for long trips.

    Good luck

  5. #5

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    I can totally sympathise.

    Luxxe HATES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! driving in the car.

    SHe screams and screams til I think she's not breathing and then screams some more! So I"m now an expert at finding ways to make the car rides easier on both of us.
    I've asked the MCHN and the paed. and the GP and everyone i've come across for solutions and I've tried everything... so I"ll share my list.

    BUT - mostly she still screams and we've just had to put it down to the fact that she is most likely car sick. We're hoping that once she's big eough for us to turn the seat around and she can see what's going on, that maybe she'll be less woozy and stop the screaming. [-o<

    We tried to give her a dummy too, but you can't hold a dummy in your mouthwhen screaming.... and besides that she has never wanted one.

    Also - it makes no difference whether Dh or myself is in the back with her, holding her hand etc.... which lead us to the car sick diagnosis.

    So here are things to try -

    Firstly - check to make sure there isn't something in the baby seat that could be sticking him or causing pain.

    make sure that he is as stretched out as possible. The way the car seats are angled when in the rear facing position means that their little stomachs get a bit squashed as they are hunched over and it can cause wind, which hurts them and makes them cry

    try turning the music/radio off and just talking or singing instead. Your voice will be more soothing.

    he's still young, but maybe hang a dangly toy in the back for him to look at will be a distraction

    make sure he's warm enough ( I bought a snug-as-a-bug wrap and it's really great because you can get their feet covered but still lets you buckled the harness easily)

    try and time your outings when he's most likely to be asleep or is due for a nap.... make sure he's fed and well burped before going in the car seat.


    I've found that stopping and comforting generally leads to even more crying once you get back in the car.... I've found it best to just keep driving, get to where you're going and then he can stretch out and burp etc and have a break.

    It's gotten so bad that I relaly only go out with her if I need to. Everything else is done when one of us can stay home with her.... seriously it's that bad.


    Hopefully for you it will be just a once off..... and if not maybe something I've listed will help.

    Good luck!


  6. #6
    mooshie Guest

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    lani used to scream in the car, whether it be a 5min trip or a 5hr trip, we finally worked out that it was all to do with the sun or the glare shining in her eyes, we got some of those window sox and bang she was fine, even now at 19mths old she crys out as soon as the sun hits her eyes, so now she wears her sunglasses in the car like her mummy lol.

    sorry it probably isn't helpful info but i just thought it was interesting, as it took us quite a while to work it out, my poor ds used to cover his ears the whole time we used to drive cause of the screaming.

  7. #7

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    Yasin hates the sun too so we got him some baby banz - they look so cute!!

  8. #8
    angelfish Guest

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    It's really horrible when they're crying and you can't help.
    Have you checked that there isn't any reason for it - apart from the fact that he'd rather be in your arms than in the seat? How old is your baby - is he still rear facing? I found with both of mine, they were much happier once we turned the seat around and they could look out the window.
    I have also found that a quick cuddle and/or breastfeed tends to make things worse when you strap them back in, unless you are able to feed him to sleep and put him back in the car without waking him.
    Ds never took a dummy, and dd only had one for about 4 months, but it wasn't that much use in the car, because it only works if they need sucking but not feeding, which doesn't happen all that often unless hes' a total dummy-demon who needs to suck virtually 24/7.
    What I do now is just watch the clock. I make a decision that they can cry for 10 minutes, and after that I will stop for as long as it takes to comfort. More often than not it only takes about 4 minutes until she falls asleep (although it seems much longer).

  9. #9

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    I can so sympathesise. When DH and I were both in the car I would climb in to the back to comfort him while DH was driving. When I was driving I would often have to pull over to calm him down. Its so horrible to see them get so worked up.

    Jo

  10. #10

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    Without fail Kynan always ends up getting hysterical on long car trips. We can't always stop, or not for long anyway, if we have to be somewhere, so I sit in the back with him. He's never like dummies either but often he's happy to suck on my fingers. I stroke his head or leave my hand resting against his cheek or forehead. Music sometimes helps - even just the static on the radio, and I also read to him (or rather, recite, as I know it off by heart LOL). Kynan's had a little blankie in the car since he was really little and he now likes to cuddle & suck on that too.

    HTH.

  11. #11

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    Thanks guys. I did think about whether he was being pinched by the seatbelt or something. But it wasn't his pain cry really. It started as whingy crying, and when he got no response from us.. just wound himself up into a frenzy. I know he was definitely overtired, coz we'd been out all day, and he'd had broken sleep in the pram.

    He's normally fantastic in the car, either drops off to sleep straight away or looks placidly out the window.

    We do have shades on the back window, haven't put the window sox on yet.. he's not really affected by the side windows yet.. probably more when he gets turned around. I've got them, just haven't fitted them yet.

    I have to admit that I loved the cuddle we had when we got home. He was immediately quiet, with that little sooky left-over sobbing and just snuggled into me. It was so cute.

  12. #12

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    Hey Ivana

    Lucy sometimes exercises her lungs while we're in the car and I've found a few solutions:

    1. I lengthened the straps, I was squashing the poor child. I'm such a bad mother...

    2. I tuck a blanket/bunny rug tightly around her so that her arms are almost wrapped as if I'd swaddled her.

    3. I hung a dangly toy from the capsule attachment so it waves backwards and forwards in front of her. I think it might be hypnotising her, because since it's been there she seems to go to sleep much more quickly!

    4. We bought a head support thingy so she's not lolling about all over the place.

    I do give her the dummy, but if she's upset that goes flying so isn't much good. If it gets real bad and I pull over and put the dummy back she settles down though. We have got the window thingys, the sock ones and some stick-on ones on the back windows, but I think that was more for us than her, she'll sleep no matter how bright it is.

    Also, I try feeding her before we're going out and once she's done and falling asleep I put her straight in the capsule. If she fusses a bit I find swinging the capsule a little or rocking it usually puts her to sleep before I even load her in the car. Even walking around the house to pick up my keys, handbag, etc, can be enough. But I think you have a carseat rather than a capsule?

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