Get Organised.. Without Tears??

[Kaylene]

I really hate mornings. I’m getting rather big now and so I don’t have to walk more than once a day there and back, DH is taking DD to Kindy on his way to work. It’s wonderful but…. how, oh how do you get your family up, fed, dressed and out the door without tears and under an hour?
I prepare everything the night before so all I have to do is feed and dress. (I ONLY HAVE 1 CHILD BTW) Little miss gets up at 6.30 (never wake the sleeping Lion any earlier or it hits the fan) and we do the breakfast thing. She will then take 1/2 hour (or more) to eat breakfast (in between singing, talking and many fake tears when I encourage her to eat more or faster). Then at 7.15 I dress her whilst she is still picking at food, the occasional tear fills in the final few moments. Do her hair, more tears over the fact her banana isn’t yellow enough or Im still hungry can I have fairy bread? and she is dressed. Late, Hubby and bub leave for kindy at 7.45. Cuddles and kisses and they are gone. I breathe again. It doesn’t seem that any amount of routine or pre-preparation helps. The more organised I am or the earlier I get up the later hubby is for work. What’s your trick to get them out the door??

[Phteven]

TBH it sounds like most of your morning routine is taken up by breakfast and I think that half an hour is longer than I would tolerate for breakfast.
Of course all children are differant but I find that any action with thier food after 15 minutes is just playing. I give the boys a bowl of cereal for breakfast and what they haven't finished in 15 minutes is chook food. I don't bother much with encouraging them to eat, I figure that if they're hungry they'll eat. Also I try and pick my 'fights' and food is one area where they will always win - I can't exactly force them to swallow it lol so I make sure I offer healthy foods at appropriate times and then what they don't eat I just remove without fussing over it. When I find myself stressing over food I try and remind myself that a child who is offered healthy food at regular intervals won't starve.
Maybe you could save time by giving her a choice of 2 foods for breakfast the night before so that she feels a little empowered by having the choice and then in the morning when she's had 15-20 minutes to eat her fill just take the food away and get on with your routine. As a back-up maybe you could have a banana stashed away for her to eat in the car if she says she's still hungry.
If dressing is takiing a long time maybe little miss could help you by choosing her clothes the night before (from a small mummy approved selection) so that they are laid out for the morning.

[Kaylene]

Hi Dach,
Yes most of the morning is the breaky fight. When she isn’t going to kindy she prefers to pick all day which is fine, but kindy have selected times. 9.30, 11.30 then 2.30. Shes so little and the thought of her hungry makes me feel awful. I have said to kindy that I feel the portions at meal times are too small but I seem to be the only one complaining, she is always starving when I pick her up and mostly has bad wind pains (she only gets them from lack of food). So I feed her up. Cereal, toast, juice eggs, fruit what ever she wants and sometimes a bit of all. And mostly she eats it just takes her FOREVER!!.. I dont know if I could take it away when she is still hungry. I suppose if i did it every day she might get the picture. Maybe might practice it on non-kindy days first to see what happens. Thanks Dach will LYK how it goes.
K

[Astrid]

Do you have a problem with her eating in the car? If you are worried that she is hungry could you give her an apple or something non messy to eat on the way to Kindy? I find I often have to do that with Maggie, she doesn't seem to want to eat when she wakes up, but will munch in the car. Also when I pick her up I always make sure I have a drink and some food that she can eat on the way home.

[paradise lost]

I know she already gets up early but could you get her to bed earlier so when she wakes (hopefully a bit earlier) she has time to not eat immediately. I can't eat right when i wake up, and any breakfast i start right away takes so long to get down i might as well have begun half an hour later, kwim?

When we were kids and had to hurry up it was always a lighthearted contest - "see if you can get dressed before mum finishes singing 10 green bottles!" that sort of thing. Less tears and no nagging for you.

Bx

[MrsFabuloso]

How about if you did the dressing and hair thing first then the breaky part? Maybe she will eat better if she's not so rushed and maybe you won't need to rush her if she's dressed first?
Or can you take something to kindy for her to eat there, like a breaky bar, fruit or a boiled egg? Maybe pack a lunch box of non perishable foods for her to eat at kindy if you think she doesn't get enough to eat during the day, she may be more likely to eat it if it's 'hers'. She could help choose from a certain selection you have approved the night before.

[Lucy]

It's a tough one. I work 2 days a week and this getting us all ready and out of the door bizzo was the hardest bit of my return to work, so I really empathise!

What I am going to suggest works for us.....keeps us all happy and well fed, & makes morning times on my work days a bit of fun, rather than a stress out.....

Obviously prep as much as you can the night before.
I lay their clothes on the dining table the night before (which they can see, and my eldest (age 3) gets a kick out of viewing her outfit the night before, even down to matching socks and hair ties, LOL!

For breakfast (all of my children eat like kings for brekky, so I hear you on that one!) I make up, the night before, a "breakfast box" (in a tupperware lunchbox) for them to attack in the morning......it includes a peice of fruit, a box of sultanas, a cold sausage or some ham, a hard-boiled egg, a breakfast bar.....you get the picture......it is all food that can be prepped the night before, and all things that are not too messy, and all things that can be eaten straight from the box at the table or in the car.......

No TV on at all until they are all dressed in the morning, and no brekky until they are all dressed either. Quick game's a good game!

We have a race to see who can be the fastest.ie I have to dress them all ready before Daddy gets out of the shower....

They usually fall upon their breakfast boxes with a mighty hunger by this stage, but if they mess about, they know that the lunchbox lid gets snapped closed and they don't get to delve into it again until they are in the car.....

They all appear to think of it as fun, and the mess is reduced to the managable area of my car......

Not sure if that helps any?

ETA

more tears over the fact her banana isn’t yellow enough or Im still hungry can I have fairy bread?

Olivia (my eldest) started doing things / saying things like this a lot from when she was about two and a half.....when I was heavily pg with Lexie. In hindsight, it was not about the banana or the fairy bread or anything like that at all. I am sure, in hindsight, that it was all to do with her "sensing" a shift in my behavior 9ie she maybe was picking up that I was really knackered and pre-occupied regarding the impending birth!), & I am sure she sensed her little world was on the change yet again. Often when they pick up vibes regarding change, their behaviour changes a little too, for a short time......so it is not really about the banana or the fairy bread, but more about her trying to assert some "control" for herself in the situation? A little bit of a 3 year old "power struggle" almost?

(I may be wrong about your DD, LOL, that was just my recollection of how things were for us.........)

Best of luck either way!

[Kaylene]

Some fantastic Ideas thankyou all for taking the time to reply.

Kindy wont let outside food in as there are children with strange but dangerous allergies there, but eating in the car isn’t a problem. Good thinking, I might change the routine a little too, by doing her hair and clothes first, giving her more time to wake up. Her bed routine is finally working well so I dare not wake her any earlier, I did try but each time I paid a cruel price.

I love the breakfast box and if she hasn’t finished take it along with her, that’s a fantastic idea Lucy, thankyou. And yes it makes sense that the changes in my mood reflect through hers. I will keep an eye open on that one.

Thankyou all so very much I will practice and LYK what works

K

[JoMarie]

Kaylene, have you tried a rewards chart? This worked womders with my girls as mornings have always been hideous here! I did up a sheet for the girls which had pictures of what they needed to do in the mornings.
I.e. - 7am - get out of bed
Eat breakfast
brush teeth
get dressed for school
brush hair
pack lunch box into school bag
8am - leave for school

I found this worked really well for them as they kept checking their list to make sure all their "jobs" were done, and if they got everything done (without the tears) they got a sticker on their chart. When they got 10 stickers for getting ready with no tears, they got a reward (of their choice, pre agreed).

Now that they are 7, we still have a list (Chloe is forgetful and goes off into her own world in the mornings) and their jobs have just changed a little - they now have to make their beds and make sure they have everything for school like their library bags etc, and they can get dressed with no help.

A reward chart can be used for a short period to get them into the routine of getting ready for school. Once they have mastered it, you can wean them off the chart, or change the task - going to bed without tears, picking up of her toys etc.

[Kirst11]

Your DD sounds similar to mine. She generally grazes during the day, and I have to get a boot up her to get her going on Kindy days.
On these days, I make sure that I am up and showered and dressed before everyone else. I dress her as soon she gets up, and then offer her two breakfast selections. I find that if she chooses what she eats, she will eat it quicker. While she is eating, I feed and change the baby if I haven't done so already. Her bag is packed the night before, so I throw that in the car.
If I'm not satisfied that she has eaten enough to get her through until 9:30 morning tea, I give her a banana to eat in the car.

I must admit though, it has taken me a while to get into the groove with DD1, and now that I have DD2 to deal with too, I was a bit worred about fittin gher into the schedule. It's worked out pretty well so far. If we happen to have a bad breakfast morning, more bananas in the car.........LOL!!!

[Kaylene]

rewards chart
I.e. - 7am - get out of bed
Eat breakfast
brush teeth
get dressed for school
brush hair
pack lunch box into school bag
8am - leave for school

I love this idea, how cool. She is SOOOOO competitive, even as an only child (changing soon) that I think she would fall into this with bells on.
Thank you what a great idea...
K

[Kaylene]

I must admit though, it has taken me a while to get into the groove with DD1, and now that I have DD2 to deal with too, I was a bit worred about fittin gher into the schedule. It's worked out pretty well so far. If we happen to have a bad breakfast morning, more bananas in the car.........LOL!!!

Exactly my feelings, if I cant get one to eat and off to kindy how will I go with 2??

Thats my main reason for asking what to do. I need to get a new routine in place and running Before bub gets here. Everyone has given me excellent ideas that I will run with this week. She goes to kindy on Wed so will test ideas this week and LYK what is working


Once again Thankyou everyone.
K

[JoMarie]

Kaylene - if you try the rewards chart, let me know how you go! Good luck!