Oh i went through the same thing. I remember that night like it was yesterday.
She is 13w now, and its still rare for her to have a sleep for more than 20 mins. I have learnt that she will only be happy to be put to sleep after 9:30 pm, to which ill change nappy, wrap, feed, and into her cot. She will usually drift off to sleep.
Im sorry, i cant really help you as im still trying to figure it all out myself. Im considering a hammock though, if we do go down that path ill let you know how it goes.
Oh and please dont think you 'ruined' her coz you soo havent. Ive heard babies need to be helped to be put to sleep (rocking, patting, singing, gently bouncing, what ever works), because they dont know how to by themselves.
Give Ngala a call, hopefully you will find them helpful. all the best. And if you find the miriacle trick, please let me know, coz im dying to know