Oh we went through the same thing at 6 months and it SUCKED! Here I was trying all these gentle settling techniques and my baby was receiving it like I was torturing her. It was so stressful and I just hated trying to get her to sleep during that time. I really feel for you, it's exhausting - but if our experience is anything to go by... it is a phase. For us it was a reasonably long one (about 2 months I think) but it may have been as it took this long to try 20 diff things before we found what eventually worked for DD.
Basically, we stopped 'trying' to get her to sleep. She seemed to be picking up on the cues that any kind of rocking, darkened room etc was an attempt to get her to stop playing and sleep, so she'd instantly buck up and start wailing. So... we kept the pre-bedtime routine the same so at least it was still these as part of the rhythm of our day (book, song, cuddles, sleeping-bag etc) but then instead of going straight into her room, I'd just start wandering slowly around the house with her in my arms. I'd hum or sing quietly and she'd settle down to try and hear me and would be content to stare at the rooms, lights etc. passing her by. As she relaxed I'd slowly move her into more of a 'cradle hold' and keep walking, then I'd just quietly wander into her (dark) room and turn her music on. If she reacted badly at all, I'd just keep humming and wander out again. If she stayed calm, I'd wander around her room and then start more of a rock. Over time I could get more quickly into going into her room and she'd relax more into me holding her and wandering. I think it helped me a great deal that I'd decided that I wasn't going to stress about it and try too hard to get her to sleep. I think she felt the lack of 'pushing' on my part and was therefore more relaxed. Since about 8 months I've been able to go straight from the pre-bed time routine (so the same cues are in place) and now just walk into her room and pop the same music on. I still kind of keep her upright, have a bit of a cuddle and a gentle sway to the music until she's quietened down from playing before attempting to settle her to sleep.
My state of mind continues to make a HHUUUUUUGE difference. If I'm in a rush to get something else done, stressed, anxious, whatever and just want to rush it and get her off to sleep, she's almost guaranteed to be awake longer. If I can remember, I just focus on my breathing for a while, enjoy the snuggles and relax with the music (I've made sure her bed-time music is music that I like) and she seems to just absorb my calm and drift off more easily. Much better for the mental health too!!
Thanks for the replies & tips - it's a relief to know we're not the only ones going through it!!
Babymama - yes it is very exhausting. I come out of his room absolutely drained once he's finally asleep.
Jasp - thanks. Sounds like he might come through it on his own eventually, hopefully it won't be too much longer!!
Tippytoes - hope you got some good ideas to use too
Peg - unfortunately he's doing the same thing during the day sleeps, so it's possible that it's having an affect on his nights. Will try playing some soft music.
Santosha - I agree, state of mind makes a big difference. I try hard to remain calm & quiet so that he doesn't pick up on how stressed I feel (some days I try VERY hard!!). Thanks for sharing your story.
Registered User
Reply With Quote
Bookmarks