Hi Ladies

I have always been very lucky in having L home at dinner/bedtime, so it's been easy with 2 of us. Now he has to work some nights and I just don't know what to do.

Kai is going through a very clingy time the past couple of weeks. I guess it's related to Jade's arrival although I felt he had gotten over the worst hump. Is he going through some sort of developmental phase? I don't know. His sleep (never good anyway) is pretty bad - waking up 3 to 4 times and won't go back to sleep unless we sleep with him (he started sleeping in his big bed last week - his choice). And it's taking around an hour to get him to sleep at bedtime, where he has been really good for the past 14 mths.

Kai had his bath as usual, then into his jarmies and a long cuddle. I explained to him over and over that he needed to get into bed and go to sleep because I needed to get Jade into bed too. I tried to say that I needed him to be my helper because Daddy wasn't there. I put him into his bed, stroked his head, told him I'd be back in a few minutes to check on him, that I loved him, etc. He kept getting out of bed so I put him into the cot (after a couple of warnings). By this time Jade was getting quite upset so I got her into her jarmies and started feeding her. He was SCREAMING mummy, mummy. I have never heard him so upset. We have always tried to respond to him quickly and have never left him to cry and now I feel like 2 years of hard work are being unravelled. I feel sure he hates me. And poor Jade just gets the quickest possible feed, no lovely cuddles and is just dumped in her bed with a dummy and she goes to sleep without complaining. I feel so awful. She gets so little attention as it is, poor girl.

I just can't see a way to keep them both happy. It takes about an hour to read to him, bath him, cuddle him and get him into bed. No matter how I try to tweak her day, she is going to need attention at some point in that hour. Any advice or suggestions are welcome. I feel so down and sad.

Thanks.