My revelation came last year. We have lived a long way from our families for a long time now and have always made the effort to get gifts to every person. Last year my sister decided she was too poor to buy for everyone so the family should so KK. Fine but DH and I weren't there on Christmas day so it felt like we were just opening random gifts fro people who really didn't even know us, so it was wasted.
This year we opted out of the KK and we didn't expect anyone to buy for us. We sent pressies for the kids but only stuff that was easily posted. I wish we'd said it years ago. So much easier. My shopping was done weeks ago and I could spend what little extra we had on the kids. Totally agree about the gift giving validation though MD.
I did send a pressie for mum and Dad though as they have just made a mammoth effort to get up to see us and we wanted to show our appreciation.