Homebirth General Discussion #17

:baby: Babies Arrived :homebirth:

- 2012 -
Jennifer13- Baby GIRL born at home 4th January 2012
Bella29- Baby GIRL born at home 10th January 2012
HotI - Baby BOY born at home 21st January 2012
*Ash*- Baby BOY born at home 14th February 2012
loulabelle - Baby BOY born at home 24th February 2012
Cricket - Baby GIRL born at home 15th May 2012
chocorama - May 2012
...Em - Baby BOY born at home 7th June 2012
BellyBelly - Baby GIRL born 11th August 2012
Tanya - Baby BOY born at home 16th August 2012
phynna - Baby GIRL born at home 8th September 2012
lady_neon - Baby BOY born 27th September 2012
Ambersky - Baby BOY born at home 3rd October 2012
Cassius - Baby GIRL born at home 4th November 2012
Ice cream - September 2012
mirriumu - November 2012
Pumpkinzulu - Baby GIRL born at home 12th December 2012

- 2013 -
Sara - Baby BOY born 18th January 2013
turtlejane - Baby GIRL born at home 31st January 2013
Bellany - Baby BOYS born 14th March 2013
Ree*Ree - Baby BOY born 18th March 2013
Aimz - Baby BOY born at home 21st March 2013
Beatrix - Baby GIRL born at home 7th April 2013
Rubyshoes - Baby BOY born at home April 2013
Dollyroux - Baby BOY and GIRL born 29th April 2013
HomeStyleMumma - Baby GIRL born 8th May 2013
ladybirdflies - Baby GIRL born at home 23rd May 2013
Cricket - Baby BOY born at home 26th August 2013
Sepata - Baby BOY born at home 31st August 2013
WilliamsMummy -Baby BOY born at home 17th September 2013
Loulabelle - Baby BOY born at home 17th September 2013
Arimeh - Baby BOY born 20th September 2013
Sunnylove - Baby GIRL born at home 2nd November 2013
Eenee - Baby BOY born at home 22nd November 2013


:bellygrowing: Babies On Their Way :bellyrubs:


TeniBear - December
*The_Mrs* - December
Jennifer13 - January
Special - January
HotI - February
Arcadia - February
Smoke Jaguar - March
Bella29 - May


Mummas of Little ones who left too soon
Glorious
Ladybug

Congrats babe!! I can't remember, was this your first water birth? I also turned the water nice and red fairly quickly...just a few days before I had been explaining to DH that not everyone makes the pool red, and he didn't have to worry :rofl: Get some arnica into you if you haven't already. So happy for you.

Oh eenee! That is wonderful news! I am so pleased that you got the homebirth you so wanted and that everything went well. Are you gonna encapsulate your placenta?? They say it is good for well being after birth. I love the name too! I have a thing for George. Dh won't consider it for the new baby because he is English and the new royal baby is a George. Oh well! Anyway, so so happy for you! Enjoy your baby moon!!

Congrats Eenee! Sounds like the birth was amazing and glad the whole family got to share it! Enjoy your babymoon with little O.

:leap: Congratulations eenee! Welcome little O :D

Congrats Eenee!! Well done!!!

Hooray!! Congratulations!!

Welcome baby boy!! Rest up mama. Sending hugs your way x

Congratulations eenee!!

Woohoo, I have a "booking in" appointment at the hospital on Monday... I know it's just so they have everything on hand easily if I end up transferring, but I don't want to go! I have to see the doctor who I saw through my pregnancy with Ianto, and I loathe that man. No idea how he managed to get through medical school, even back then I seemed to know more than him :lol: But at least it's not for any kind of care, just the booking-in stuff. Any idea what I should expect? I'm going from thinking it'll be a full-on interrogation to just signing a few pieces of paper and going on my way :p

Also, here's my obligatory ":eek: I'm next on the list! :o" haha

Isn't the booking in supposed to be with the midwives? Why on earth is a doctor doing it?? As the hospy if you can just do it with the mw, I suggest. Mine went super smoothly with a mw and I told her what my plans were. Try bypassing the doctor, as your first port of call xxx

Congrats, Eenee! I missed your post - sounds like it was gorgeous, and of COURSE you are a champ :) Look at what you made!

if you have already been to the hospital, they will have any info they may need (personal details etc) if you transfer. Just ditch it.

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if you have already been to the hospital, they will have any info they may need (personal details etc) if you transfer. Just ditch it.

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I actually didn't even think of that. That's true. The only reason I went to the booking in was because Monash didn't have my details, otherwise I wouldn't have bothered.

Glad i never had to bother with booking in, being a hospital program my midwives did it.


You know some times its surreal sitting in my lounge room and right now I am watching little miss roll around on the exact spot she made he entrance to the world in!!

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I actually didn't even think of that. That's true. The only reason I went to the booking in was because Monash didn't have my details, otherwise I wouldn't have bothered.

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Yeah, me either... If I get time I'll give them a call, see if it's absolutely necessary. They'll probably say it is, but whatever. I'll call MAMA too and see what they say. I know on Monday Kris said something about it but I can't remember what it was :redface:

Good point on seeing hospy midwives instead of the doctor - again, you're right. My appointments were always written in as being with the doctor but I mostly saw midwives. So that'll probably happen again, if I go.

EDIT: Oohhhkay, it's so they have the most up-to-date information on THIS pregnancy. It'd be in the stuff MAMA sent over, but the Northerm apparently insist on actually seeing the "patient" and not taking the midwives' word for it :wall: So at least I have an answer in that regard :) I don't really mind greatly, I just don't like that hospital. If it were the Women's or the Mercy I wouldn't have as much of a problem, I'm just prejudiced :p

I've never had to go to a booking in appointment. The midwives just sent everything off.

My back up is at the Women's.

I actually enjoyed my booking in! I have never used the hospital here since we moved (thank goodness!) and I am keen for them to have my details, to avoid any delays in the case of a transfer, and I wanted to present myself so that they would have a face to go with the homebirth plans. I think it was well worth it, in my case. The other reason I wanted to go was (the mammalian instinct!) to see the environs I'd have to be in if I transfer, for whatever medical reason. I didn't get to do that with the last one because I was booked in to the Royal Women's, at a time when they allowed that (they don't now - it's all about catchment area now).
I had a great FBC experience the first time, and was apprehensive about going to book in to a maternity ward but the mw was so good in her manner and understanding that apprehension left me as soon as I saw her.
Out here in the country I don't have the luxury of the midwives booking in for me. My mw works out of the further away hospital and we discussed booking into the closer one. It's like guerilla birthing out here for homebirth, and I was really glad to do my bit to raise awareness for what homebirthers have to do that other birthers don't have to worry about, just to plan a safe birth. I'm used to being a standard-bearer, though, for many things ;)
My own mw and I discussed that I could see my preferred GP and the ward mw's for most of my check ups, to keep the costs down, and the hospital is a 5 min drive away and not out of my way for appointments, and it's not an imposing place. So, in a way it sucks to plan a HB out here, and on the other I know the hospital is just in the same town with no traffic lights to get to it!

Teni, I went to two appts for DD2's pg at the hospital - one with a m/w and one one with an ob (as it was a VBAC). But I'd never been to that hospital before. Both appts were actually good, even the ob was supportive of my HB plans.

This time, I rang to book in and they told me I didn't need to come in, just to fax over all the details on m/w notes from this pg and phone a m/w to discuss. Simple. Maybe you could ask if you could fax over your pg records so they have everything? I also included my birth plan.

I didn't bother booking in, didn't tell them anything didn't fax anything. Couldn't be bothered to waste my time there to tell you the truth ;)

I just went and did a booking in appointment this week. I was wondering what the reception would be, but I was just about to be called in and an old friend who is a me there walked out and had a good squeal at seeing me, and she decided to see me instead of going and having her lunch. It was great and uber easy! So no getting to be a standard bearer for me. I just rolled up, answered the questions and off I went again :). But that's it for me. No more appointments, unless there is a problem.

The thing for my situation here in the country is that homebirthing is so under the radar that when the laws do eventually change the caregivers around here need to know that people want it and need to know that people have been prepared to have freebirths without their ridiculous hospital and doctor collaboration.
What I'm saying is, lucky for you ladies who don't have to do booking in yourself or don't have to be the brave minority who front up with their homebirth plans out in the open. Really. Because I was one of you and then I moved to the country.
I KNOW how much easier it is for you metro people to access homebirth, despite restrictions on hospy programs...you have hospy programs! I wish we were all in a position to take for granted that we didn't need bookings in. Please be mindful in your responses of those of us who actually have a bit of a struggle to get what we have a right to plan. It is coming across as dismissive, just to let you know. It used to feel a lot more supportive in this section, and I'm in here to get the support I don't find IRL, increasingly in vain (in general, not just this section) :(

Is that aimed at me SJ? Cos it wasn't meant to be dismissive. In fact I was prepared to have to tell them my story this time, be the standard bearer so to speak. And it is a big deal for me cos my husband is a senior dr at that hospital. Last time I just lied to not have to deal with the bull**** of having a hbac. And also to protect my midwife and husbands reputation. I'm was surprised it was so easy, for a huge amount of reasons. Partially because I just don't know what the response was gonna be.

Anyway, I am sorry that this group is not helping you feel supported. Is that because we arnt all in the same boat? It doesn't bother me who has a hospital supported bh as opposed to an independent etc. I can see the draw backs of some peoples situations, but I am not effected by it in a personal sense. I am just worried partially for you, and also wondering if I am missing something? Would you like to elaborate?

Sorry you're not feeling supported SJ. I've considered moving to the country many times but on researching birth options we have decided to wait until all our babies are here. I know I'm in a privileged position. Sorry if you felt the weight of that privilege in my response. It wasn't intended and I'm certainly not ungrateful for the freedom metro living gives me for birthing options. I honestly have never heard of a booking in appointment. Ignorance is bliss hey?

How are you otherwise? I'm also concerned you're not getting the support you need.

I live semi-rurally and have no support locally. My birth support is not part of any clinic or hospital, hell, she is not even registered. In addition to distance, many IMs were not comfortable in attending my birth due to my medical condition. In the current climate, having a second birth support person is incredibly difficult due to my primary not being registered. If a registered midwife were to attend my birth, she would legally be considered responsible for the event, regardless of the position that she was hired for, or volunteered for.

I have not booked in to a hospital, because if i transfer if is due to an emergency. in an emergency, i have notes that have my personal details. I do not believe that the hospital needs to know my personal details, or what my blood pressure or measurements were at each appointment (if it is not relevant to why i am at the hospital). I don't need to hear their judgement or face their questioning. Additionally, dependent on what the emergency is, i may go to the local hospital or i may travel to one of 3 other hospitals. Circumstances will dictate where i go, i am not going to pre-book in all of them jic.

I think it is important to question why we do things. why you want to book in to a hospital. I can understand that some people find comfort in having that option sorted. Having an interesting birthing history might make checking out the local hospital beforehand a more attractive option.

When offering responses to Teni, i considered that she had already been the hospital, including at least once this pregnancy. She doesn't like the person she is booked in to see, and my impression was that she was expecting an interrogation on her birth choices. Teni has mentioned she doesn't like confrontation and it didn't sound like she had a support person lined up for the appt. So my suggestion was to not go to the appt. Question what benefits there are in going. What harm is there in going, particularly as Teni heads in to the last few weeks of her pregnancy and should be surrounded by loving and supportive people.

We come from many different backgrounds and circumstances. A number of discussions here i feel isolated, and sometimes frustrated, because they don't apply to me. But for other topics, it is here i come for support because i think that there others who may have or be experiencing similar.

Wow didn't realise my experience or feeling a aren't valid because of my 'luckiness'.

No one is down playing the struggles others have, especially not on purpose nor should I have to be mindful about saying exactly what happened with my pg and birth in fear that some people who yes are more disadvantaged then I am due to the programs available to me might be offended.

Because IMO if programs like The one I used are extremely successful and seen in positive light more often the chances are that they will be expanded and become more available throughout Australia, which I believe would be a great outcome.


Every homebirth or attempt at one is fantastic and I feel that sometimes it seems to be a competition of who has to jump through the most/less hurdles. We should all be working together to promote homebirth and by being vocal with differences/hurdles or ease with all options is the way.

Hi mama's
Sorry I haven't posted in awhile. I'm hibernating from the cold and because I'm trying to finish up all the wraps I need to weave for before baby gets here(I'm a weaver). I'm so exhausted and drained and can't believe baby girl will be here soon. I'm actually hoping I go late so I can get everything finished but I know that's not how babies work haha! I have all my supplies for the birth and just need towels. I've started taking some alfalfa to boost my vitamin k as I'm still a little nervous about hemorrhaging. Also, recently I've started to become scared of having a HBAC. I know it's just my mind getting anxious/nervous for birth. I hate the what ifs and hope my uterus won't rupture. Bleghhh sorry to sort of a downer!

Hope everyone is doing well!!

Not a downer, The Mrs! That's what we're here for! Uterine rupture, from what I have read, is not as common as the doctors would have you believe. You are so close :) It's understandable that you would start to have some doubts, given the past experiences - now to have some power over them ;) You are doing what you can and you are well-prepared. Put your fears where they belong - they are fears of something that hasn't happened, and your body and brain will react as if what is in your imagination is real (the brain has real trouble distinguishing between fears and real things in front of you to be scared of). Breathe in deep and long, and get some endorphins happening - keep adrenaline to a minimum and only let it out of its box when that baby is out xx
I was not being facetious when I said I was happy that a lot of you are 'luckier'! I don't do facetious (I did it once on BB, many years ago, and apologised for it very soon after for it never to be repeated - before most of your time!). I'm not advocating that everyone book in, in the least. I appreciate the reasons people give for it, including the reasons my homebirthing sisters in my own area give.
I didn't say anything about 'not valid', Beatrix - that's what you've added ;) Nothing about 'offence', and quite frankly, nothing negative about hospital programs, despite how other people see them as too controlling. For the same reason I will continue to support hospital programs (you would find that I have never maligned them) is the same reason I'm fronting up and maintaining a relationship with my local hospital about my planned homebirth. You said it, Beatrix - you feel as if it's a competition about 'hurdles'. Where I am genuinely happy for people who have minimal hurdles - I had much less work to do for my first homebirth. I wish I had that again. You don't have to identify with people who pursue it a bit harder. You haven't had to defend your hospital program to me, and never will. I could see you arming your defences a few pages back but didn't think you saw anything as a competition until now.
HotI, similarly, you have been clear with your reasons, which will help anyone who comes in here to read about the decisions people make and why, even if they never take part in discussion. Like you, I urge people to ask THEMSELVES why they are doing things and to question everything. Earlier in the thread I had debated with myself about letting the doctors and hospital know what I was planning. Now I'm clear on why I would do that, so I explain myself.
I am mindful of the audience other than that directly taking part here, which is why I got to effort to position myself. You think other people don't lurk here? You bet they do ;)
I also come from a background where in my last pregnancy there were the likes of the Joyous Birth people who would denigrate homebirthers who used midwives, as if they were 'selling' out and not trusting their bodies and were being 'compliant', good women by using someone medically-trained.
We all have our unique journeys to get where we are and to achieve what we plan for. I'm not asking to be allowed to compete (because anyone who actually knows me from my past username will know that couldn't be further from my agenda), just that those of us who are in hospital programs, booking in, seeing GPs etc are considered just as determined to trust that home is the best place to plan a birth as those who don't trust the medical fraternity for their own reasons (which are mostly outlined in this thread by those people).
Looking back on this page alone, Sepata, your comment was the least helpful post. Could you please elaborate your position? As I said, everyone's perspective is helpful when offered as more than a one-liner.
My belly buddies group has defected to FB, where I don't want to have a buddies discussion, and I have found BB not to be the place it was for me in my previous two pregnancies. I drew a lot of courage and camaraderie from BB in the past and, in sad realisation, I'm not getting that this time round. It's not anyone person's fault, it's just a reflection of the changes that were bound to happen here. A general dissatisfaction. I have a rather debilitating pregnancy condition that I posted about in the relevant section a little while ago and my post has remained the last. So, yes, feeling a little high and dry and sick of answering real life questions from strangers without the community here to take refuge in. I have large age gaps between children, so I don't take part in many of the baby discussions here on BB. I stopped BFing my DD back in August/September (she was nearly 4 - but not as old as my DS when he stopped), and even then it's a bit lonely in the 'BFing older children' thread when 'older children' are now described at 18 mo ;)
I guess I'm just facing the fact that BB and me are drifting apart, after 8 years. It happens :)

Big hugs SJ, I know what you mean about the belly buddies groups sometimes drifting to fb. My last one did and I didn't join, so it became less helpful or supportive. Also consequently the only persons I really go to know were two girls. One Jen, because we were both in here and hbac'd. This time around, whilst it has been suggested to provide more privacy, we have all resisted a fb group, so that it remains inclusive. And it is turning into another really supportive group where we are all getting to know each other. Anyway, sorry you are missing out on that. Xx

SJ- Maybe Im sleep deprived or just not really focusing enough to quite understand if I have upset you or something along those lines.. Im just confused.

So in my clarity.. I never ever meant to upset or offend anyone with my comments about being lucky to skip and miss a whole heap of hurdles/costs.. because its genuinely how i feel about it. I KNOW i got it easy and had what many homebirth women would have loved to have had, but yes in a sense sometimes I do feel defensive and invalid which you did pick up on a few pages back.
Yes I have felt dismissed due to the way my home birth came around. Yep I admit it was more so a back up plan JIC, and if I didnt labour as quick as I did I would have had a planned hospital birth.. but even in saying that I support every womens right to choice how they birth.

I am thrilled beyond belief that I was able to birth my baby girl at home with my hubby and I and yes it makes it extremely special and after that experience if I ever decided to have a 5th (not going to happen) I would have every intention of having a home birth again.


I admire alot of you for what you have to go through. I hate confrontation and wouldnt cope with alot of the hurdles and hell I admire that fact that your scrimp and save to do what your passionate about because I know if I had to pay, it wouldnt happen.


hmm I dont know if I have really clarified anything

but maybe

Yay home birth yay womens choices yay?

Beatrix, for what it's worth, I don't see your homebirth as any less valuable to the birth rights movement as anyone else's :) It ALL helps, and, in fact, I see the hospital programs as being more useful as a way for homebirthing to gain acceptance in country areas, to eventually gain hospital 'collaboration' etc. I know there are people out there who think the hospy programs are 'sellouts', and I'm not one of them. According to some, I'm a sellout for wanting a midwife presence at my births ;)

I don't think hospital programs are 'easier' just as i don't see IMs or birth worker support as 'easier'. Each woman has their own circumstances and own needs, and sometimes what is available to them lines up with their needs and values (yay!), and sometimes some creative thinking or problem solving is needed to find a solution that fits the circumstances.

Thanks for your post SJ. I am feeling a bit drifty in many parts of my life atm. Not really fitting in with BB crowd, but not exactly aligned with the JB crowd either. Not conformist enough for ABA, but nowhere else to look...

Thanks, Bella and HotI - I was starting to think it was just me!
HotI - I was kicked out of JB for being too moderate, and, in the past, told I was too militant on BB ;) I miss my old ABA IRL group and never really got into the ABA forum.

Hey SJ, can u PM me your old user name? I am sure I know you, but I didn't check your recent posts when you swapped it. Every time I see you post I wonder who you are.

Thank you all for the discussion :) I'm not the deepest thinker (big surprise, hey? :p ) so it's good to see some of what I've been feeling put into words without my having to explain exactly what I mean. We all know I'm hopeless at that :lol: I've been a bit "drifty" lately myself, feeling even less like I fit in anywhere than I usually do. I hope I haven't contributed to anyone else feeling that way too! I always worry I'm upsetting people :redface:

So, I'm going to the hospital appointment. I was more after an idea of what to expect at it than thinking about why I should or shouldn't go, but I am thankful that I did end up doing so. In any case, my midwives want me to go, so I will. I might be a (potential) homebirther, but I'm still easily-swayed little Teni, not a fighter. I can't remember if I said it in here or just in an SMS with PZ the other day, but my general way of dealing with a lot of situations is to set myself up with/near people who can help me achieve my goals. That way it's easier to avoid confrontation (as HotI said, I'm not a big fan!) and I can just get on with it. I know it didn't work for me last time - I trusted the wrong people - but I hope it does this time. At the very least (assuming it all happens at home, no transfer) I know *all* of the people around me will be people I trust rather than whoever's on shift. And if I do transfer? Almost all the people who come with me can back me up, give me strength to *try*.

See what I mean about not being able to get across what I want to say? I've been typing this for half an hour, and parts of it still don't make complete sense. I'm only hitting the submit button because my phone's about to die and I don't know where a charger is...

To all of you, I meet IRL with a group of women who've used the services of the group my IM is a part of (that's city privilege for sure! But I do know how lucky I am). IKWYM about having trouble fitting in elsewhere. In amongst that group are all kinda of mothers and mothers-to-be. Some used an IM as support for a hospital birth and some for a planned HB, although some had to transfer (there are no hospital HB programs anywhere near me). Some were twin births, some VBACs, some ended up with a c/s despite planning a HB. Most are just plain old HBers. ;)

This HB group here on BB reminds me of my IMs' get together group. We are very different and come from such different experiences to choose HB. Some, because it's more convenient and available, others feel they have no other option that provides them with a respectful birthing space. Some of us are other places on this continuum. I am glad to hear from all of you, because all of your experiences provide something that I can draw from and take with me as I go on my own birthing journey.

:hug:

Here's your new THREAD, lovelies. Beautiful birthing vibes to all expecting bubs :hug: