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Thread: Please, please wean DD!

  1. #1

    Join Date
    Jan 2005
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    Default Please, please wean DD!

    I'm so darn tired. Beth is now 2 and still a boobie monster. I'm home now and she wants to feed aallll day.
    I can distract her ok during the day, well about half the time. When she is tired it used to help her get to sleep in about 5 minutes - but now she screams when I put her down! She just wants to stay in my arms.
    She will still wake 2x a night for a boob, it doesn't seem worth the screaming at 2 and 5 in the morning so I pop her in with me.
    I've been sleeping on the couch on and off for months (its pretty comfy), because she is still in my room (can't do anything about that right now). She senses when I am in the room and will wake more frequently through the night.

    We were going ok for awhile, then she got more teeth, then I got sick, then she got gastro so I was letting her feed a fair bit more than usual. So it went on for ages and now she won't back off. I probably wouldn't mind if she went through the night again, waking a 5am for a quick feed was ok with me.

    I also can't handle it when she pretends she wants to boob at bedtime but just uses it to stall going to bed. It's the one thing that will ensure she goes to sleep well, but she knows it too and mucks around, pretends shes drifting off then springs up smiling (ggrrr at 9pm). Another thing is our thin outside wall (house not finished) and the proximity to our neighbours bedroom window. I mean this kid can SCREAM... Dp attends to her at night when she wakes but she won't have a bar of it and just screams mummyboobies, mummyboobies until she distresses herself.

    So I want to wean, she doesn't and that bothers me -the other 2 weaned simply and when they wanted to. The screaming when she doesn't want to go to bed and the boobie negotiations go on so long at night when we are all buggered.............help!

    I have read right through Astrids thread (how is it going btw?), and will try more distraction and will change our bedtime routine so we are reading stories in her (my!) room. I get the impression I'm in for a fight here and I'm too tired to think straight WAH!



    Any tips??

  2. #2
    mum3girls Guest

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    I'm going through a similar stage, but just night-weaning my nearly 20 month old. We're at the stage where she'll go to sleep without boob now, but lots of cuddles (and I have to be standing up ), first few nights were good, just cuddles and she'd be back asleep within about 5 mins. But the last week has been shocking, and I keep giving in as well
    Have you read The No-Cry Sleep Solution for toddlers and preschoolers? I've found it brilliant to refocus myself ( haven't picked it up in the last week though - maybe I should!). It's got a chapter on the nightime nursling - heaps of really good tips. Let me know if you want and I can post some here or PM you.

    Good luck - I'll be thinking of you at 2 o'clock tomorrow morning when I'm up with my little darling

  3. #3

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    Oh please do! I need to prepare for this methinks...

  4. #4
    DoubleK Guest

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    Lulu, i swear it was me who wrote your first post! Krystal is exactly the same! whenever i sit down, she thinks that means its booby time! i can distract her, but i usually just dont sit.. makes it easier. but sometimes i just need to sit and relax.
    she also wakes at least twice during the night, and comes into our bed, i feed her and carry her back to bed.

    i will be watching this thread, and borrowing some of the advice you get!

    good luck with it!

  5. #5

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    I really feel for you. It is so damn hard when they are a boobie addict. DD is weaned now, but still asks on the odd night. She had become quite polite about it "can I have a drink from your boobies - pleeeeasse?". It is hard when it no longer gets them off to sleep nicely, I think that was a part of my decision of having her wean. I really did need DH's help though, even though there were tears, at least it was him trying to come up with the distraction than me. With him she could not smell the milk. I had some nights as well where I would disappear to the lounge, mainly due to DH snoring, but I found she slept better when the boobie temptation was removed.

    The hard has really paid off, bedtime is so much better, takes about 30-45 minutes. She just a has a bottle or sippy cup of milk to drink whilst we read stories. I do little things like let her pick the last book (of 2 or 3 that I have picked), then let her turn out the light. I honestly thought awhile ago that it would not happen, but thankfully it has.

  6. #6

    Join Date
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    Ah the boobie monster.....I know that one all too well! Ned is a boobie monster but now will get to sleep himself. It was a long hard road but I bit the bullet when he was feeding 5-6 times at night at 16 months and I had a meltdown.....Here's what worked for us...
    - First night was hell. Took him about an hour and a half screaming to get to sleep but I stood by his cot and reassured him that I was there but there was going to be no 'nun nun' (his words for boobs). I BF him in his room in the dark and then put him into his cot awake (yeap I always fed to sleep before too)
    - He woke about 3 times the first night. Each time I just stood there calming him (stroking, patting, lying him back down) until he was back to sleep.
    - After a few days he was waking only about twice a night, still taking about an hour for him to get to sleep initially with me standing there by his cot.
    - After a week or so it was better still, waking maybe only once a night. Still an hour or so t o get to sleep initially.
    - I kept the standing by his cot thing going for a few weeks. Some nights he started sleeping through.
    - After a couple of weeks I started going out of his room after putting him in his cot. I'd go in if he got distressed at all. It was literally only about a week and he was putting himself to sleep without me there.
    - Now I have got to the stage where I feed him and tell him when I have finished feeding him and he comes off himself and points to his cot, goes down quietly and 6 out of 7 nights will sleep through. I have my evenings back (because teh entire feeding and putting to bed only goes for a bout 20 mins) and only get up once a night if any. It was SO worth the hard yards and even though I did it really gradually and it took a long time, I just could not go through CC again.
    Good luck (now I hope I haven't jinxed myself................)

  7. #7
    mum3girls Guest

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    Sorry it's taken me so long to get back to this thread - haven't had time to sit down and type out a decent reply. How's it going at the moment?

    Here's some of the tips from The NCSS for toddlers and preschoolers - will post in more detail later.

    * Use the Pantley Gentle Removal Plan to help break the sucking-to-sleep habit (make sure your child is done 'eating' - when she is not sucking and swallowing, just pacifying - before you gently remove the nipple from her mouth)

    * Create a new Bedtime Routine - Finish the bedtime routine with something that relaxes your child eg. soft music, massage, etc. Avoid having your child falling asleep on the breast during the first half of the night - helps to break that sucking to sleep sensation, hopefully leading to less likely to wake up for the breast when they stir during the night.

    *The Storyteling Ritual - Breastfeed earling in the evening, then have your child lie next to you in the bed in the dark and tell a story. The key to this is to have your child lie in bed without nursing.

    *Set Time Perimeters - Set a chunk of time during the night when 'boobie sleeps' - eg. from midnight to 6am. This is the option that I've been using, but boobie sleeps here from 7pm til 5am ( I've been really slack with this lately though - consistency is the key with this option).

    *Use light and dark as nursing cues - Day time boobie is available, night time boobie sleeps - fairly self-explanatory.

    *Adding motivation - Have a box of 20 or 30 small toys, treats, etc. individually wrapped. When your toddler goes for the whole night (or whatever you guys set for your family) without boob, she gets to pick a lucky dip out of the box.

    I found my biggest problem was that my daughter had decided her 'lovey' was my boobs!!!! Both of them!! Pantley talks about this in her book, though suggests that it's usually boob and teddy/blankie/mum's hair/necklace, etc. My darling decided it's one boob in the mouth - other boob is for playing with So we're working on replacing that with another lovey - still working on that one.

    BBL with more info

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