Oh I remember feeling EXTREMELY sad that my BF days were finished. My story is a bit different to yours though as DD was 8months when she decided to end it.

The way you describe your DS arching away and screaming is just what DD did but she also bit me (with all 4teeth) with every attempt to attach. She also appeared to want to nurse, just as your DS looks like he is about to attach. I persevered for 6weeks before I gave in because she did really want to feed and, as you describe, would occasionally but not as well as previously.

I guess my decision was made for me as she still needed so much milk being only 8months at the time so I weaned her over to EBM then FF. I am not sure what to advise you with your DS being over the magic 12months. Congratulations on succeeding for so long though!

If you are worried about missing that magical moment in the day of BF, I did too but I still get a similar feeling with my DD. She is now 14months old and has her morning/evening bottles lying in my lap, cradled like a little baby. She holds the bottle and I use my spare hand to stroke her body and face/hair and we stare lovingly into each others eyes. It is just as nice as BF I think.

Hope my experience helps a bit. Sorry I dont have anything else to offer though.