Hi, Lime,

It seems like you have had a lot going on for your whole family lately. Sickness, partner working away and to top it off, an impending house move are the "biggies" in life.
Your little girl Charlotte seems to be acting completely normally for her age. (not that that makes it any less of a challenge!) Many mothers are aware that from 9-12 mnths their babies are wildly inquisitive with the world around them - barely able to sit still and breastfeed, and into new tastes and textures. At this age many of us feel it wouldn't take much to wean our babies. Yet, after 12mnths they fall in love with breastfeeding all over again, and we feel at times they are almost like newborns. As they become more and more aware of the world, their need for security becomes greater. Yet, as their growthrate slows in the second year, their need for food becomes less. They seem to exist on milk and fresh air alone.
There is no doubt that if you wanted to fully or partially wean right now, you have done an amazing job with your little one, and should only feel pride. Yet, as many of us do, you seem conflicted. There is no doubt we all have "days (sometimes weeks) like that" when we just feel completely "touched out" and feel we have no more to give, yet crave recieving some of that love and nurturing ourselves. Sometimes the pressure to wean comes from without. The "looks" and the "are you still doing that?" questions become more and more pointed. And, the truth is, we have very few breastfeeding role models at that age. The grass starts to look much much greener on the other side of the fence. But often we still sense a need in our child, and maybe ourselves, and that's where the conflict comes in.
You can breastfeed and have a sex life. (Have you ever noticed that the most *attached* parents have the most children? The time is probably right for a good talk with your partner - let him know what you you want and need. Chances are he will want it as much as you, and be prepared to do whatever it takes. I would suggest you need a little nurturing of your own. 2 weeks with out a partner is tough going. You would be within your rights to head for the hills (or the shops, or a coffee with a girlfriend) when DP gets home - let him have some quality father/daughter time alone. Remember, this can't go wrong, so some-times you have to let go a little. My dh works away, and I know I used to almost resent him coming home - wrecking my "pattern" (routine would suggest something that didn't really exist) I was almost glad to see him go, while desperately craving having him home. I bet your little one does sleep sometimes. The afternoon, or that early sleep in the evening or maybe in the morning when you two wake a little earlier than she does. (then when she wakes, one of you can take her for breakfast and a little playschool and the other can sleep in a little) It can actually be fun! (yes, really) And I don't think it hurts for them to see mum and dad really love each other! It's funny and sweet that you move them over in bed or onto the floor and they don't even stir. And can even be a little exciting wondering if you will be "caught". You may need a little nurturing to get you in the mood. Taking care of some of the household chores for your partner (the vacuuming and washing for instance!) can be very sexy. A foot rub, a back rub and some nice kissing until you get into it is great (tell him not to be too upset if you just go to sleep the first couple of times.)
Back to Charlotte. She will be fine in creche. A little separation anxiety will be normal. But she will adjust. Chances are, she is waking up in the night because she loves hanging out in mummy;s arms, knowing you are there - not that she is hungry. I bet she won't meltdown if she stays with anyone else. She's cluey, she knows that when you aren't their breast is just not on the menu. But having said that, it can be wonderful including your children in weekends away and dinners out. Different - but fabulous in it's own way.
And, you can always come to BB for a listening ear. Sometimes, we don't want a need a "packaged solution" that comes wrapped with "You've made a rod for your back" We want some acknowledgement of the great but hard job we are doing, and, well, a little vernt! Why the heck not! If you ever need some validation - you've come to the right place. Most of us are quietly taking our hats off to you, you are doing a fabulous job, whichever way you go from here on....