I have one of those too. I promise she won't starve, but it does suck when you're trying so hard and nothing seems to work.

I'll tell you what works (randomly and never consistently I have to tell you) for us.
The biggest battle is with yourself. I know it's hard. I have watched my sister battle with her 8yo his whole life. He still eats nothing. That's my incentive.
They way we eat our meals is an adult value. Small children don't understand the whole 'this is what you're supposed to eat and when' thing.
If I realise early enough that the day is turning to poo I try and have some frozen dinners I can heat him up for lunch. Then when dinner rolls around and he's either asleep (he does this a lot) or he just can't manage dinner, it's no biggie.
I also make sure he always has a good brekkie and arvo tea.
My DS doesn't do mixed or sauces/mash either. I try to make sure he has 5ish foods - 3-4 familiar and 2-3 that I'd like him to try.
I always only offer half of what I'd like him to eat. Sounds dumb but it's less overwhelming for them and more often than not he'll come back for more. If he doesn't he usually has a good crack and I can praise him for nearly eating it all.
I let him pick (with in reason and from what we're having) what goes on his plate.
He has a couple of segmented plates that work when he's not particularly co-operative.
I let him pick where we eat (again within reason). Usually it's at lunch time but occasionally we have picnic/outdoor dinners too.

Nothing works straight away, but since last year where he refused to eat anything but frozen peas for a full fortnight we've made significant advances.
Good luck.