thread: 17 Year Old Mum.. Will We Be in Trouble?

  1. #1
    Registered User

    Apr 2009

    17 Year Old Mum.. Will We Be in Trouble?

    Hello everyone.

    I'm 17 and I'm almost 7 months pregnant. The truth is it wasn't one of those 'flings' or random hook-ups. We are deeply in love and have been together for over a year. We plan to get married as soon as I'm 18. I just have some concerns (you'd think I would have nightmares not just 'concerns' but I'm actually OK.. Really!).

    Since I'll be giving birth at a hospital nearby, my question is will my boyfriend who is technically an adult (he's 20 years old now) be in any sort of legal problem when we report to hospital for my maternity visits?

  2. #2
    BellyBelly Professional Support Panel

    Nov 2005

    Hi Sunshine8
    Are you in Australia?
    If so don’t worry he will be fine. It is legal to have sex when you reach the age of 16.

  3. #3
    kirsty_lee Guest

    Legal problems? I wouldn't say so... your over 16 for one... I might be totally wrong of course, but I wouldn't think there would be any problems at all especially from the midwifes...

  4. #4
    Registered User

    Jan 2009

    It may depend on if you were 16 when you fell pregnant -which could be determined by the date your baby is born. But I think it would be up to the individual midwife to make that decision, can't say for sure.

  5. #5
    Registered User

    Oct 2007
    S/West Sydney

    i would lean toward that also KL- I dont see why there would be an issue... r u in Aus...

    Its legal to have sex from 16

  6. #6

    Mar 2004

    I'm surprised that you haven't been to the hospital yet. Most women are on fairly regular visits by seven months.
    Of course you won't be in trouble. You're 17 and your baby was obviously conceived long after you reached the age of consent (which is 16 in Australia and most other English speaking countries). Most Australian hospitals have programs for parents as young as 12 and they don't concern themselves with the legalities of the conception.
    Good luck with it.

  7. #7
    Registered User

    Mar 2007
    on cloud 9.....

    Nah, you'll be just fine. I was 17 when I was pg and gave birth at 18. My partner (who became my husband when bub was 4 months old) was 4 yrs older than me. The hospital staff never once batted an eyelid or looked down on us at all, they were great, even in our antenatal classes.
    Please make sure you get onto the hospital for checkups won't you.

  8. #8
    Registered User

    Apr 2009

    Thanks so much for the feedback.. Yes I am in Australia and I was just a bit worried that my boyfriend would get in trouble. He's the father and we both want him to not only be listed on the birth certificate but play an active role in the family.

    Once again, your feedback was a relief.

  9. #9
    BellyBelly Member

    Jan 2005

    Hi Sunshine & Welcome to BB

    Congratulations on the impending arrival of your precious little bubby.

    Like everyone has said neither you nor your partner will be in any trouble you are both over the age of 16 so all is good. I must say i am a little shocked though that you havent been to hospital yet, probably just because of the fear you have had but seriously now you know everything will be ok you should probably now make an appointment...most people at this stage of the pregnancy are on regular visit's.

    Take care and i wish you all the very best,
    Leah x

  10. #10
    Registered User

    Mar 2007
    on cloud 9.....

    Sunshine, bet you feel a big weight off your shoulders now. That's great that you have your partner for support too. I wish you all the best.

  11. #11
    Registered User

    Feb 2008
    Down Under

    well first of all congrats!!
    i dont see why they should have a problem.. goodluck xx
    Last edited by Muffy; April 15th, 2009 at 08:58 AM. : spelling

  12. #12
    Registered User

    Dec 2007
    Taking a ride on my grdonkey :D

    Hi Sunshine!!
    A friend of mine was 8 weeks pregnant the day she turned 16, her baby's dad was 19, and no, the hospital staff never involved themselves in the legal aspects of her pregnancy. She had a wonderful pregnancy and is now the mother of a gorgeous 2-year-old, unfortunately her relationship with bub's dad didn't work out long-term but these things happen.
    So seeing as you're over the age of consent, I don't forsee any problems. As another poster said, hospitals see girls as young as 12 expecting babies, it's their job to make sure you and baby are healthy, not go 'dobbing' on you Their main concern would be to ensure that you look after yourself during your pregnancy so you can have a beautiful, healthy baby!!
    I'm pretty sure that in Australia, the chances of your partner getting into trouble with the law are very slim if you aren't making a complaint, if that makes any sense - prosecuting somebody for this kind of 'assault' is quite difficult and the law *is* flexible - as in, if you were just slightly under 16, but it was a consensual relationship and your parents/guardians were aware or encouraging of the relationship, it's pretty much out of the courts' hands. And even if, say, a family member was pressing for charges, a judge would most likely be lenient because you and your baby's dad are in a relationship and he is a willing father - even if he were to be convicted of something, he wouldn't get, for instance, jail time, because a judge would see that he is needed at home with you to help raise his child. But, you were over the age of consent when you fell pregnant so there's no worry for you and your partner at all

    Please get yourself off to hospital to begin antenatal checkups, the next few weeks are going to simply fly by you so it's time to start getting yourself organised! Just pop up to your local hospital and tell them that you need to start seeing the midwives for antenatal checks, they will help you out. You can also do shared-care with your GP (which is great if you have a bulk-billing one you see for all your regular medical needs), so if you're more comfortable with a familiar face, do that too.

    Congratulations on your pregnancy, I'm glad you have the support of your partner during this time! Becoming a parent is hard on people of all ages, but it's such an amazing experience. We have a forum here for young couples, and lots of other discussion places that I'm sure you'll find helpful, so if you have any questions don't hesistate to ask, good luck with your pregnancy and welcome to BB

  13. #13
    Registered User

    Jan 2006

    It should be fine but I am pretty sure in most states it is legal ot have sex if you are over 16 AND your partner is not more than 2 years older than you at the time. But really, no one at the hospital is even likely to ask how old your partner is - I imagine they will be more concerned with making sure you three are supported as a family than trying to pry into your private life.

  14. #14
    Registered User
    Follow Pandora On Twitter

    Jan 2005

    Congratulations on your pregnancy.
    I'd be calling the hospital today to orgnaise some sort of antenatal care if you have not done so already. Give you were 16 (at least) you will be fine, and as others have said thehospital wont generally concern themselves with it.
    It should be fine but I am pretty sure in most states it is legal ot have sex if you are over 16 AND your partner is not more than 2 years older than you at the time..
    Consent laws in Australia vary by state, but once you are 16 or over its fine. It's if you are under 16 that the 2 years older comes in to play. For example in some states its legal for a 12 year old and a 14 year old to have sex, but not a 12 year old and a 15 year old. And some specify that its the female who is to be younger

  15. #15
    Lucy in the sky with diamonds.

    Jan 2005
    Funky Town, Vic

    It might be a good idea to look around and hook up with a 'young parents' program in your area if there is one.

    I'm not sure why you think it might have been a problem to list him on the birth certificate, but if someone told you it would be (and also your ages being a problem), I would seek to get advice from someone that actually knows....not someone that might blow the wind up you.

    There is plenty of help around here - Welcome to BB.

  16. #16
    Registered User

    Jan 2006

    cheers for that rayray