Is it financially possible?

[Toomanytoomany]

We are having #6 at the moment.

We don't have a large income but we have employer provided housing. I work full time and will be having a year off after the baby is born. We have two small cars and are going to try to make that work rather than forking out for a larger single people mover. We don't often all travel together anyway.

The things I'm going to raise are not really with day to day costs but other things to consider, more related to the other end of parenting, when the kids are much older.

My 18yo is extremely resentful that we're not putting her through university. We just can't afford it - we will have four kids at school next year. We've let it be known that the kids would have to get part time work and use HECS to get through university, all the way along, but it is still causing resentment and upset. (Probably because dd1 went to a private girls' school and all her friends are getting assistance from their parents.)

We also expect that our children will *not* stay at home until their mid twenties... the expectation is that when they finish school, they'll start preparing to leave home. They also need part time work from about sixteen because funding the social lives of teenagers is not something most large families can take on without a significant income.

Again, this causes resentment with my two eldest daughters (the second is 17) and puts pressure on their schooling. They also have to deal with the reality that by the time their youngest siblings are in highschool, there'll be a lot more money to go around and they are aware that as the eldest, they are bearng perhaps a bigger share of the "cost" of being a child in a big family.

While small kids sharing a room is just fine and dandy (and we'll have six kids in a 3 1/2 bedroom home) it's harder for kids doing their last years at highschool when they don't have a private place to study.

We can't save for our own home yet because our day to day costs are eaten up with food (our grocery bill is $350+ per week) and other expenses.

We did not anticipate any of these issues and in some ways I feel badly for my eldest daughters particularly that they are wearing more of the negative consequences of our choices.

I don't regret having a large family, not one bit. I think the blessings and benefits far outweigh the bad bits! But it's hard to get a teenager to realise that sometime, and I wish I had been warned or prepared for those issues.

[Sair]

Wow thanks for your story TooMany! It is hard to see the larger future picture so there would definitly have to be considerations made on that front. How ridiculous that your daughter expects her school to be paid for. I am one of 3 and my parents would have never paid for my schooling, I got a student loan and it was my responsibility to repay it. I was also expected to leave around 20 although I left at 16.

It is so different in regards to what people do for their children here in Australia. A lot of parents do help out their children here where in Canada you are basically taught to be independant in that sense.

I did some math the other day, I would be 40 and having the 6th child more than likely My dream might not happen after all Where did my youth go?

[Malyna]

regarding seeds, you may also want to look out for local community gardens or farms, where they will sometimes sell their excess seeds quite cheaply (ie $1 or $2 a pack).

I'd love to have a big family but I've left my run way too late - #1 at 38, doesn't leave much breathing space!

[smiles4u]

Most of my friends in the suburbs of Melbourne can't afford more than 2 children ... yet a few people here in Ballarat (country Vic) i know are having 3 or more children

TRILLIAN i love your quote ... i have been teaching my 2.5year old daughter to say VAGINA as my Mum never gave it a nickname either

TARKINE ... i had my 1st bub at 40 ... trying for no#2 for 16mths now (will be 43 in Jan) ... A Mum in my playgroup had her 1st bub at 46 (through IVF) ... oh, you can do it again, nudge nudge wink wink (by the way, all the very best with your 1st bub ... my sister had her 1st at 38 too )

Little Miss Sunshine ... Hello 1st bub at 40 here (hee hee) !!