I can understand It's horrible when the kids are brought into it. My son used to come back saying "mummy is fat" and all sorts of stuff that my ex's gf (at the time) had taught him. It was hard because I could tell how much he missed his daddy but he didn't like her at all.

Does she drive? Because the courts will order middle ground drop offs, when I went to court for the boys their dad lived 3 hours away, they said to meet half way. Also he can claim travel cost on his Child Support. I am also pretty sure the courts don't favour parents who move away and effect the children seeing the other parent.

It can be hard, but maybe it's in the best interest for everyone if you and your DH seek legal advice and get some sort of agreement in place. That way there is some stability for you all, and noone is missing out. 5 hours is a LONG way to travel, but it's doable. Matt used to drive 3 hours up and 3 hours back to get them, and the same to drop them off 2 days later, every 2nd weekend for over a year to see the boys. I have since moved closer to him (half an hour away) and everyone is happy