Hi Jo. From my experience, its not that much harder going from 3 to 4 than it is from 1 to 2 or 2 to 3 etc. In time you find your groove and before you know it, it's like you've always had 4 kids. What are the age gaps going to be? I have 20mths between my first three, and then 3yrs 3mths between 3 and 4. Its been great - I've handled it much better than I think I would have with a closer gap, but then if the gap was closer I would just have to get used to it kwim? Once you have kids in school it gets trickier though because you have to time feeds around getting the older child/ren off to school, but it's manageable - you have to make sure that you organise yourself well.
People often say I must be busy with 4, and yeah, I am to a certain extent, but then I was still busy with 3 kids and I find I am more busy with the older three than I am with my baby.
One thing that was really important to me was not having any regrets - I didn't want to not have a 4th baby and always regret not having him. They are little for such a short time in the big scheme of things and before you know it they are old enough to fend for themselves, so its only for a few years that you are really busy chasing after little kids and babies and then you have the rest of your life to sit back and enjoy them.
It's really no big deal with little babies. It's only as they grow and need to be dropped off at school/kinder/afterschool activities. I find a bigger family EASIER as they all keep each other busy and well entertained. Older children are quite good helpers too.
Thanks ladies,
Some of you asked the age difference in my children. I have 3 girls 6,3 and 22 months. I think my main concern for another one is financial, although I already have a big 7 seater car and I'm sure we could make room for another one somewhere in the house, and of course I have all the baby equipment. Just means another few more years not working. Things are pretty tight now I don't know if it will make a huge difference with another one. I'm also 35 so my eggs aren't getting any younger. I am also a bit scared that my family and friend will think I'm completely MAD!!!!!! How did you deal with others opinions.?
I wanted to add too that from the money perspective, no matter how many kids you have you still will spend the same amount of money but its the way its spent that's the difference. If you only have 2 or 3 kids, then you spend more on them or you might take a more expensive holiday each year, but when you add another one to the mix, you still spend roughly the same amount, but your holidays might be more of the budget kind and instead of buying brand name clothes new, you buy them second hand from ebay kwim? Its only as big a problem as you make it.
I just remember all the OMG's I got with #3. I just don't feel done yet and I don't know if thats just my clock ticking and the feeling will go away (it's been with me for a few months now), but I'll be 35 on my next birthday and I wouldn't want to mull over the decision for too long. Gee I wish people were so supportive in the world outside BB.
Thanks for asking the question as I too are thinking of going from 3 to 4 I have my days where I really really want to then some days where I am scared *****less thinking how could I be so lucky to have another happy heathy baby would I be tempting fate by going again? As you can tell I am no help to you what so ever as I am going through the samething but thought I would reply so that I too can read through all the answers you are getting...Good luck with your decion I 'think' for me I am going to tempt fate once move are have another but wont start trying until next year...
I'm so envious of you Mum's that have the luxury in my eyes to have a possible option of having a second child let alone a fourth child
... Took us years to have a baby which I finally had at 40 & at 42 now we are so trying for another bub
*** I say if you are thinking of a Fourth child & can "A" afford to & "B" are emotionally & physically equipped to & "C" you BOTH truely want another child ... I say " GO FOR IT " and what's the hold up ???
ENJOY YOUR CHILDREN & ALL THE VERY BEST OF LUCK IN DECIDING
I hope my question hasn't offended anyone. I have just thought about my query about having more children and I didn't mean to sound ungreatful for being blessed with 3 when I know others are struggling for 1. I think what is stopping me is my over annalytical mind. Was just interested in how others handle the logistics and financials with a large family.
Jo, just remember that everyones situation is different and where you posted is the correct place for the ??? raised. It certainly has been very difficult emotionally and phyiscally with the MC's and time wise for me to fall pregnant with no4. I would hate to be starting at this age (40)otherwise this definately would not be an option. The feeling does'nt go away, I tried to fight it for a while, whether it is the biological clock ticking, saying this is the last chance who knows???? But it is a very strong urge!!!!! Starting to try again sooner rather than later is a great idea, your baby will be a nice age when the next one comes along. Heaps of luck to you.
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Should I go for #4?
and what's the hold up
???
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