What made you decide to add to your family if you thought you had finished at #3??

[Arimeh]

The need comes and goes Mel, and I know the longer I put the decision off the easier it will be not to have anymore (cos I don't want the gaps too big) then I might regret it later. So if I wait too long to decide I'll miss my window.

yup this was me too. My basic thinking is - would you regret having one or regret NOT having one. Answer is pretty clear for me on that one

[halltribe]

I think that the first 3 are the hardest and then gets easier from there. You have already done the ground work with the older kids so from number four they are growing up with the rules already set! A friend always said that 4 was the minimun number of kids to have as 1 is alone, 2 only have each other and fight, 3 there is always the odd one out but 4 just works great! I know this is just her opinion but I see her sense!

[~clover~]

A suprise
I was happy with 3. Still not convinced I need 4, but it's a bit late for that!!

[jaspen]

subscribing to watch the opinions as this is the place I am at - and I know the flack for what I want is going to be huge

[Hannahbanana]

A friend always said that 4 was the minimun number of kids to have as 1 is alone, 2 only have each other and fight, 3 there is always the odd one out but 4 just works great!

I like this thinking. Might procrastinate on it a bit I think!!

[megs]

Hi Hannahbanana,

I'm in your exactly situation right now, my little man has just turned one I I'm not sure that I want to be finished having babies. I would love one more and I think that it would suit our family better, DH isn't quite as convinced as me. I too will be interested to see the replies to this thread, I know my window of opportunity is pretty much the next 6 months as I too don't want a big age gap.

Sorry I couldn't help but just wanted you to know that I sympathise

[maz]

I never wanted children...had DS1 and knew instantly that I wanted another. Had DS2 and knew I didnt want anymore (due to health reasons)...then after having 3 m/c I knew number 3 was needed and DD was born.....when she was 3 months old the urge pulled at my ovaries and tubes like a shopper to a 50% of sale. I fell pg with twins which I m/c at 8 weeks.....then said no more trying for 6 months but DS3 had different plans...I had my tubes removed after his birth...and at 3 months that urge hit again. I hated myself for getting 'done' but looking now...at my family and the dynamics.....4 is perfect for us ..it makes us complete.

Dont get me wrong...I would never knock back another baby....but I think when seeing a nb doesnt pull at you, doesnt make you jealous that its not yourse...you know its a clear sign that you need to concentrate on the babies you have rather then should have.