Bring a plate etiquette

[angelaartsstudent]

In my experience this usually results in 10 types of Potato Salad...

[sassy123]

that is nothing compared to my SIL. she never eats when everyone else eats but demands for a plate to be left for her to take home. or if she does actually eat she will still demand for the let overs so she doesnt have to find somethign to eat the next day.
mind you she never brings anything in the first place either.
It doesnt help that my family are all big eaters so nothing is usually left at the end of the meal lol.

[Just Me]

I never assume that I will be bringing any food home from take a plate things unless the host insists. Mind you, I usually dump anything left over in the bin anyway - most places that are bring a plate mean food has been sitting out for ages and lots of people have touched it or hovered over it, other things have been dropped on it or it just generally looks unappetising by the end of the event.

[jackrose]

**BTW Mods - it would be nice to have a etiquette section ***

I like this idea!

[briggsy's girl]

i tend to ask the hostess what is needed - if i get a vague "i dunno" answer, i'm the first to buy something in a packet that i don't care if it gets opened or not - so much better to have them stay fresh than lots of wasted food! if i'm asked to take home something i've taken cos there are left overs, i'll usually organise with others in a similar situation to "share" stuff so we take a mixed plate each - and then feed it to DH if he hasn't been there... if we take freshly baked food, he's usuallly baked it anyway...

if i'm having something here, and people offer to bring something, i tend to ask what so that i can make sure we dont triple up on one thing, have nothing of another... it works for us pretty well

[Nadine216]

We host ever so often and I will ring up the guest wives and tell them exactly what to bring. Salad, Desert, Drinks, Savory snacks. That way you don't get 5 starches and no veggies Or for BBQ you then have to bbq, so that you don't do chicken, fish, steak and pork on one grill!!

If it's clients, I prepare the whole meal myself.

If we go to guests, and the hostess says I don't have to bring anything. I drag along some savory snacks, our own drinks and something homebaked as a gift. I will then take my drinks home (if it's alcohol, not if it's soda) but leave the savory snacks. If I'm asked to bring something like a salad I do that and don't expect to take anything home. I then also take a gift for the hostess .. a small potted plant, flowers, choclates, biscuts, homemade jams ... anything nice.

[Trillian]

Good Lord! Who wants to bother with taking home ONE piece of cake? If this is a really issue for her then suggest that she slice the cake and arrange it on the plate nicely and then just keep one for her DD - also solves the issue of having to cut it at the party and finding a knife. Personally I never bother with taking food home - if it's still edible I usually ask the host for another plate/dish to put it in and get some gladwrap and cover it and pop it in their fridge (I usually always tend to help the host pack up the food) or if it's beyond saving I bin it and take home my plate/dish. I rarely use my good plates - I have a couple from the $2 shop that look reasonable enough to display in public LOL so I don't have to worry if it doens't come back.

[*Ang*]

I never assume that I will be bringing any food home from take a plate things unless the host insists. Mind you, I usually dump anything left over in the bin anyway - most places that are bring a plate mean food has been sitting out for ages and lots of people have touched it or hovered over it, other things have been dropped on it or it just generally looks unappetising by the end of the event.

Like most others sometimes taking home bits and pieces of food is more of an inconvenience. As long as I get my platter/bowl back I am happy.

What I do get annoyed at like someone else has mentioned is when my food is not served. This happened recently to me over Easter when I made the most delicious chocolate cake and it wasnt bought out. I was so annoyed.

[~Serenity~]

well i agree dont expect to take any home if you go to someones house or something , but in my family we usually go to a park or something like that so i just take whatever is on my plate when i leave or we had one for mothers day at ds kindy so when i left i took my plate and whatever was on it

[Floweryfields]

I agree, you take it you don't expect to get anything back on the plate. I am not sure that i would even want it back anyway - who's touched it, has one of the kids at the party picked it up and licked it then put it back!
If you want a slice, cut it up and keep some at home.

[OceanPrincess]

I've got a funny story - my BIL's girlfriend went to a baby shower and they were asked to bring a plate for afternoon tea, not sure if they were asked to bring sweets or if just coincidentally everyone brought sweets... but it turned out they had forty-five million cakes and muffins and sweet treats.

The host didn't want to be left with sweets to last her til 2020, so they had a "plate swap" and they all took home bits and pieces from everyone else's plates. BIL's girlfriend came home with some pieces of cake, a few muffins, some different slices and a handful of rumballs. Nice!

[Glamourcide]

^ Now that's my kind of gathering I love sweet treats!!

[Just Me]

I'll bet your BIL was a very happy man

[~Hestia~]

What an interesting thread!! In these situations I will take my plate/container back, but would never take home any of it unless I was asked by the host. That being said I too get secretly cross if my plate hasn't been served. Just seems like a waste of time/effort/money then.
I'd rather organise the food myself when I'm the host - too much of a control freak to leave it up to everyone else But would offer the leftovers back if anyone brought something, just as a courtesy.
The only story I can think of with this fuzzy baby brain is ages ago we had a little get together. One girl is a huge Coke drinker & so we had bought lots of Coke. She brought one bottle with her, fair enough. But when she left she took a bottle with her, despite having drank loads of Coke!! I understand taking home your alcohol - but Coke when you have been drinking the host's all night?? I didn't say anything, if it's that's important to her she could have it!!

I agree - an etiquette section is a good idea.

[Ca Plane Pour Moi]

I get REALLY annoyed if my food isn't put out. My mum did this - I'd baked so much for DS's birthday but was really ill, so Mum got food out ready. She didnt put out ANYTHING that I'd made - chocolate fudge, cakes, flapjack... DH was lucky that the birthday cake he made was out. Mum was going to make a birthday cake! At least it was at my house so I could eat it, but I didn't want it, I wanted it out!

As for taking home - only if the hostess OKs it. We do this at book club, too much food. So I usually bring something back, either wine or food. I don't mind leaving a half-bottle of wine as I don't drink much these days and if someone can enjoy it, good for them. It was only a few quid, not bank-breaking wine.

I love bring a part of a meal ideas - one person brings a starter, the hosts do the main course, another person brings a pudding. Full meal, part of the price, less washing up! And a great night in with friends. Your food will be served too, and because you're catering for just 6 people (or +children, you know the numbers beforehand anyway) there's little in the way of leftovers. Problem solved!

[{sarah}]

I love bring a part of a meal ideas - one person brings a starter, the hosts do the main course, another person brings a pudding. Full meal, part of the price, less washing up! And a great night in with friends. Your food will be served too, and because you're catering for just 6 people (or +children, you know the numbers beforehand anyway) there's little in the way of leftovers. Problem solved!

We do this with another couple, if it's at our place we make dinner & they bring dessert and vice versa.

[DoubleK]

we had a family gathering just after xmas, and the invitation said bring-a-plate. i rsvp'd by sms, and asked what i could bring, i ended up bringing 4 loaves of bread. at the end of the day, there were 2 half loaves and a full white loaf. i told them to keep it all (i had taken 2x white, 1xwholemeal and 1xmultigrain) they gave me the white loaf as they dont eat white, but kept the rest. mind you, it was all squashed by the time i got home, thanks to all the extra toys and stuff DD came home with.

[Bathsheba]

Strange that so much "a do" has to be made over a single slice of cake.. um, yeah, just make 2 I guess and keep one at home.

Whatever I take to a host's place I expect to leave there, except for my plate. If it's a large gathering I wouldn't want to take home any left over food due to contamination issues.... maybe if it was just a small gathering and I was able to make sure than no-one had touched and replaced something for example.

I also think an Etiquette section would be great.