I was having this discussion with my best friend only yesterday as she is attending a funeral this week. She thinks it does not matter what you wear. Although I kinda think it does matter.
When I attend one, I always were nice dress pants, a top and a cardi. Its just personal preference though.
I think you should be dressed nice in pants, dress or skirt but not to over the top. And alot of people do not wear black to funerals now, which I think is great.

And I would take your baby, although if he/she cries alot then I would just walk outside for a little bit.