House guest contributing -was is normal practice

[Bathsheba]

Usually we only have family stay with us (and usually it's us staying over with family) so what we all do is automatically assume that we don't want to be a financial burden... if they stay with us they usually arrive with some basics (nibblies, bread, drinks) and then after they have settled in they might go out and do a grocery shop for things that we don't have (we don't eat red meat) plus because our families go through A LOT of milk the family that stays over makes sure that they buy lots of that themselves. Usually the host family does quite well out of it... my sister always does a shop just before they leave and leaves me with some treats: choccies etc. I do the same when I stay with her. I also tend to buy the "Mother's Helper" (alcoholic drinks) when i I am staying with her... last time it was a bottle of Cointreau... oh and amongst the groceries i bought her I included a tub of Gumption because she had never tried it (it's a cleaning product) plus I scrubbed her sink and stove for her. So I guess we both go a bit out of our way to make sure that we help out the hosting family because we acknowledge that the free accommodation (and use of water/electricity/gas etc) is appreciated.

What I would do, if they don't pitch in, is say; "lets order take away" if they were considerate they would pay for the whole thing... but at the very least they should pay for theirs. Or ask them if there are any grocery items that they need that you don't usually stock... that should prompt them to pay for them. If they don't then I'd cook very cheap meals... saying that money is tight... stock up on sausages instead of steak etc. How awful that you have to worry about this... some people just have no clue do they? Grrrr

ETA: oh and when we go to stay at my sisters place my DH always makes a big fuss about cooking for them in their kitchen... he goes and buys all the ingredients too. Because we have 6 kids between us we can't go out for dinner easily so this is instead of doing that.